Mommy Moments

Happy Birthday Alex!

2012-02-07T14:55:00.000-08:00

Four years ago today our lives were radically moved with the birth of this little boy. What we went though to get there was unbelievable: 7 in-vitro fertilization procedures over several years, 17 weeks of 4 inch needle injections every single day because I was showing signs of losing the pregnancy, 3 months of bed rest, 2 weeks of hospitalization for pre-eclampsia, and finally in emergency delivering a baby boy who was 5 weeks premature. Today we have one happy and healthy boy who loves his family, his Star Wars and Harry Potter Legos, and Jesus. Every time we pray he asks to pray for someone, even if he can't think of anyone....but he always knows Mommy will have someone to pray for. He knows there is a need and he is here to work that. Happy Birthday Buddy.....my little A. E. Staley IV. Mommy, Daddy, and Lukie love you very much! You are our good boy! Our humble praise to you oh Lord above!

Do as I Do

2012-02-05T19:55:00.000-08:00

"Do as I do." - Judges 7:17.
We have a great children's Bible that the kids love for me to read to them. It has vivid drawings of what is taking place in each story. This morning I was reading out of this Bible to them as we sat on the floor and both kids were in my lap. As soon as we were done with one of the stories I got up to get something across the room. While I was up, Alex started "reading" the story out loud to Luke, just like Mommy did. At three years old, Alex doesn't read a lot of words yet, but he used the illustrations as a guide for what was going on. It was an adorable and touching moment that he was trying to "read" to his brother just as I did, and referenced the pictures in the book as a guide for him to share the story. Children are master imitators. That's why parents know you have to be careful in front of them. Even things they are experiencing peripherally can seep in and make an impact. It makes me ever more vigilant to live a life through and through that will move them to bring blessings to those they touch.
"In everything set them an example by doing what is good. In your teaching show integrity, seriousness." - Titus 2:7.

It's Still Christmas

2012-01-09T13:58:00.000-08:00

Caryn Broomby Photo

Well, it's been one of the hardest questions I've had to answer as a mother, as 3 year old Alex asks, "Why do we have to take down the Christmas decorations?" He wants to know where the tree is going, and especially where his Charlie Brown manger scene is going. It has the three "mice" men (wise men), y'know. ;) He wants to know why we can't celebrate Christmas all year long. Perhaps I should ask that the rest of the world to answer this question for me. Maybe more apropos is to ask what people are doing to keep the spirit of Christmas alive all year long. That sense of giving to others, and opening your heart to the miracle of Jesus and the joy that God can bring...shouldn't that be something we celebrate all year? Yes, it certainly wouldn't be Christmas without the greed of retailers pushing us to buy things no one needs. But perhaps without the commercialism of the holiday, we can focus much more intently on the reason for the season, and how Jesus can be there for us every day. Perhaps the best resolution for this year is to make every day feel as if the King of Kings has been born!
"Jesus replied, 'If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching. My Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him." - John 14:23.

Mary's Fear

2011-12-20T13:23:00.000-08:00

Through the immense joy and blessing of having a baby, one thing many first time mothers experience is some level of fear. There is a great uncertainty in knowing your life is about to change deeply and permanently by a person you will know the rest of your life. With that, I keep thinking about Mary this time of year. Two thousand years later we still celebrate the great joy and anticipation in the arrival of the Messiah, however I can't keep thinking of how scared young Mary must have been. As a deeply faithful woman, she was pregnant out of wedlock, told by the angel Gabriel that she would give birth to the Christ child. Moreover, she had this special child right before a time that male children were ordered to be killed, so she had to protect him at every cost (although I believe in this, and scripture documents it, there is some conjecture surrounding the truth of King Herod's orders). How could you keep it together in your head and your soul that this was the Lord's plan? Only through true dedication to God, and putting your faith in His every word could it make sense. Mary was a simple woman from a modest family. They had little means, but great faith. God knew what her heart could bear. God knows this for you too. If you have a child, He has chosen you to be their mother for a reason. The experiences you have are meant to help this child grow into the person God needs to carry out His will. What does that say about those who have not had children? That there is a plan for what you are doing also. Follow the light of that path....wherever it may lead. We are here for God's purpose, not our own (which means listening to the judgment of other people is pointless). Listen only to God. What he asks you to do at some point, or at many time, require you to step out of your safe zone and trust him. That is how faith is strengthened.
"And Mary said, 'Behold, I am the servant of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word.' And the angel departed from her." - Luke 1:38.
In doing the Lord's work to carry out His will we will reap great blessings in our heart and our eternal life. Silence yourself long enough to hear what God has in store for you...for your life...for your child's...or perhaps for someone you know that He intends you to help. You yourself may never even know the depth of it. But God will. What else matters?
"'She will bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins.' All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had spoken by the prophet" - Matthew 1:23-25.

A "Sad" Example

2011-12-03T21:55:00.000-08:00

"If you can't feed a hundred people, then just feed one." - Mother Teresa.
As I was coloring with Alex, he stopped and showed me this picture of black eyes and a straight line. He pointed to it and said "I drew a sad face." Of course any mom would raise an eyebrow or two wondering why their child would draw something like that, so I cautiously asked about it:
Me: "Why did you draw a sad face?" Alex: "Because of the other children." Me: "What about the other children is sad?" Alex: "Because they are sick and poor." Days later, he followed up this conversation by telling me that he wanted to give some of his new toys to children who don't have any.
Every night we pray with Alex and Luke that God will help those who are in need, and sometimes Alex will even ask about why they need things that we have every day. It's a time we can stop and really focus on what Jesus taught us to do as Christians and care for one another.
"For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many." - Mark 10:42-45.
We all can be so consumed with the demands of running our own lives that in between taking kids to school, activities, work, or running errands, the gravity of what goes on in other families can be transparent. It's estimated that every minute 15 children around the world die of hunger...every hour 30 children die of AIDS....and 20% of the world's children do not go to school. These are not issues that we want our children to dwell on, but it's the right step for them to dwell on the fact that they can be part of the solutions. I know the answers will come to a child's heart as long as the Holy Spirit resides there. Compassion will find a way to carry out God's will to bring aid to people who are living in need. The goal here as a mother is to keep setting the example through prayer and through our own giving or volunteerism. Then, trust that our children will see the need in the world is great for so many people...for health, for food, for clothing, for education, and even just for love and acceptance. The picture you paint of the world around them, could literally be the picture they draw for you today.
"It is God himself who has made us what we are and given us new lives from Christ Jesus; and long ages ago he planned that we should spend these lives in helping others." - Ephesians 2:10.

Your Crown of Thorns

2011-09-22T21:19:00.000-07:00

Every night when we say prayers in bed, I always ask Alex if there is anyone he'd like to pray for. Maybe someone he met or saw during the day who was sick, or hurt, or needed help with something. Tonight I asked him who he'd like to pray for and he said "Jesus." I asked why he wanted to pray for Jesus and he said "because He's sad." I asked him why Jesus is sad and Alex said "because they put a crown of thorns on Him." It nearly brought me to tears to think of the tenderness Alex showed in the suffering of Jesus. It was not the time to explain that Jesus' suffering was necessary for us to live eternally, and He knew He would go through it. But we did pray for Jesus and thanked Him for what He endured out of God's love for us. Jesus knew what was coming, and He beared every grueling moment of it because He knew the divine plan for GOOD! Following Jesus can feel just as difficult though. God never promises if you commit your to Him that life in this world is easy, but He does promise growth in your faith in Him through those trials in life.
"For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong." - 2 Corinthians 12:10.

A Clean Soul

2011-08-21T20:20:00.000-07:00

(From juliestaley.com)
Keeping toys picked up in your house when you have small children is pretty much like spitting in the wind! It's easiest to get things in order once they're in bed at night (and have put away what they are capable of for their age), but I always wonder if it's even worth it because once they're up again they drag it all back out again, and we're back to square one! So what's the use of even trying to keep it picked up? Besides having an orderly house, what I find with my boys is when things are in chaos, they seem to get easily bored and even frustrated when they are playing. Yet strangely, if things are picked up and put in place, they seem to have a sense of looking at each toy from a different perspective...a fresh view that allows them to enjoy their things even more. In essence, they are able to find what is important to them when they clear away what is not important. This is how you reach God...clear away what is keeping you from sensing him in the proper light. Don't make your heart heavy with things of this world, lighten the load for your soul and fill it with eternal gifts like joy, peace, and gratitude, hope, and faith. Speak to God to help clear your life and your soul.

"Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me." - Psalm 51:10.

What Do You See?

2011-07-07T21:21:00.000-07:00

"Be joyful always." - 1 Thessalonians 5:16.
(From juliestaley.com, Denney Photography photo)
Alex looked up in the sky a few weeks ago while we were in the car and said "look at the elephants!" My response was, "you mean those birds? Alex said "no, Mommy, the clouds!" The sky was full of all kinds of puffy, swirling clouds, forming all kinds of shapes as far as you could see. It was one of those days you could lie on the grass and find just about any animal in the sky. Of course since I was driving I didn't have the luxury of finding the fun in their design, and I just had to let clouds be clouds. So when we got to our destination a few minutes later, I made sure to take a look with Alex and Luke at the beautiful sky and appreciate the beauty and wonder God made that day. This is how it works when you choose happiness. You stop what you are doing and appreciate what God has surrounded you with. My children have taught me to do this more. Sometimes my children really surprise me in how their happiness transcends whatever they are doing. Even on a rainy day children can find beauty. Last week Alex saw a bright red cardinal frolicking in a puddle after it rained. Many adults might not have seen that because they would just imagine the day was too gloomy to find anything interesting outside. But in his wonder of the world on a very gray day, Alex saw life and color. May we all find that in our lives every day.

"All the days of the oppressed are wretched, but the cheerful heart has a continual feast." - Proverbs 15:15.

Happy Birthday Luke!

2011-06-24T21:43:00.000-07:00

If you don't think lightning can strike the same place twice, then you haven't met Lucas Mueller Staley. After years of infertility, complications, miscarriage, and heartache, Luke came against the odds. His brother came to us through IVF. I was told I could never get pregnant on my own.....but here is God's proof that anything is possible through Him. Happy First Birthday Luke!
"Jesus looked at them and said, 'With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.' ” - Matthew 19:26.
(Photo by Amy Denney of Denney Photography)

In Giving, We Receive

2011-06-07T22:03:00.000-07:00

(From juliestaley.com)
The more I watched in disbelief the images that came in from the deadly tornado that struck Joplin, MO, the more pressed I felt by the Spirit to go....to do....something on behalf of myself and our foundation. I felt conflicted because I knew we needed to help, but I also have two small children to take care of and business to tend to. Yet it is in taking care of others that we also take care of our own. Not only are we growing our soul by doing this, but we grow the importance in our children of caring for other people.

"Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others." - Philippians 2:4.

No one can ever give back what has been taken from the people of Joplin, but you can bring peace to them by working in the name of the Lord. I was surprised at how so many victims full of gratitude and hope...and God. While helping clean up debris, I heard the story of a woman named Julie (pictured with us above), who was inside her home clinging to her teenage daughter and praying to God to spare them. She said when she rebuked Satan her mouth was filled with dirt and debris, as if the devil himself was trying to silence her calls to God. Even though she lost her home, she said the chair she read her Bible in every day was never moved, and her Bible was still tucked inside the cushion after the storm. She lost everything and was still so filled with the Spirit! She was extremely grateful to all of us for helping her literally pick up the pieces of her home. I also talked to a couple salvaging items from their home when I was delivering food to victims. They blessed the volunteers and thanked us profusely for the food. They said they had nowhere to go except a shelter. They lost their jobs and their home. All they had was what we could offer them at that moment....a little bit of food, and God's love....and they were grateful.

Returning home, I bring back the images....pictures....to show my children today and in the coming years of how fragile our lives really are. In one instant everything can be blown away. I also bring back an impression deep in my soul of the gratitude people gave me in the midst of tragedy.....the ultimate test of faith.

"And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me." - Matthew 25:40.

What's So Funny?

2011-05-06T17:06:00.000-07:00

What soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul. - Yiddish Proverb.
We all know the health benefits of laughter.....it's said to relax the whole body, release endorphins, boost the immune system, and protect the heart by improving circulation in blood vessels. So why don't we work at making it a staple in our life every day? Some experts say said that on average children laugh hundreds of times a day, and adults only about 15. While most parents wouldn't argue with that, the intrigue becomes "why" they laugh so much. What is it that they feel in life that we adults do not (other than lack of sleep, and responsibility for keeping another human alive and healthy for two decades)? There is so much we can learn from children because they know how to be happy and just stay happy. Spend time playing with a child and it is impossible not to find smiles and laughter in whatever you do. Alex even knows which TV shows I laugh at the most, and if I have a moment when my attention is diverted and I'm not laughing at something, he will even say "laugh, Mommy, laugh at this." (Of course he says it much cuter because he can't say "L" so it comes out "waff"). Children rely then, on people around them to laugh too, and want everyone to experience that joy. I also see this when I am laughing with Luke and Alex is nearby. He will come running over and just sit there and pretend to laugh just so he can be a part of our giggling session. Within a second it turns into genuine roaring laughter. He CHOOSES to laugh. Imagine what life would be like as an adult if you could laugh at anything, anytime, anywhere, and just choose to be happy? Choose happiness? God gives you that choice through His love. Choose a life filled with Him, and you are choosing a life filled with joy!
“These things have I spoken unto you, that My joy might remain in you, and that your joy might be full” - John 15:11.

"At that time the disciples came to Jesus, saying, 'Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?' And calling to him a child, he put him in the midst of them and said, 'Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven". - Matthew 19:1-3.

Jesus Lives Here

2011-04-22T22:30:00.000-07:00

(From juliestaley.com)

I wrote in the October 23, 2010 posting, "Proof of God", how the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit were revealed to me through my three pregnancies. But now, this first Easter with Baby Luke and I am feeling the pain of Christ's suffering more vividly. I'm also grateful for His resurrection on a whole different level. Christ has always been a part of my life, even as a small child, but as I posted before, doubt swept in and nearly consumed me whole during my infertility. I was a spiritual mess. After God and the Holy Spirit showed me tangible evidence of their work in my life through seven in-vitro procedures (IVF) and my first two pregnancies, I still kept asking for more proof about Jesus Christ. And any Christian knows if you keep asking in His name.....the answer will come. This one came in a big way. I was sitting in my bedroom, praying for answers while I was recovering (physically, emotionally, and spiritually) from my miscarriage, and decided to play my "Bible roulette". I closed my eyes and opened my Bible to a page and my finger landed here:

"Listen! The virgin shall conceive a child! She shall give birth to a son, and he shall be called Emmanuel." - Matthew 1:23.

Considering I had not given birth to a child I conceived naturally, I took this quite literally! I knew then I would get pregnant again soon.....and without IVF. Three months later I did. It was another difficult pregnancy with complications, constant monitoring, hospitalization, and an emergency C-section. But almost a year from that day when Jesus spoke to me, I gave birth to a healthy son! Our Baby Luke is our living proof that Jesus Christ doesn't just live in heaven, He lives in ALL of us!

"I tell you, whoever acknowledges me before men, the Son of Man will also acknowledge him before the angels of God." - Luke 12:8.

Keep the Faith

2011-03-26T20:22:00.000-07:00

(From juliestaley.com)
Any mom knows how difficult it is to soothe a fussy child while you are driving. When I only had Alex I would try talking or singing to him so he could at least hear my voice even though I couldn't turn around. Mostly what I'd say was "we're almost there, we're almost there", and just reassure him the car ride was nearly over. If I wasn't driving, I'd reach behind me and pat him so he could feel my touch. Of course it really never made him completely silent, so I never thought it made much of a difference! Then recently, I was driving with Alex and Luke in the car. We were getting close to home and Luke was tired and started crying. As I opened my mouth to give my attempt at verbal soothing, Alex leaned as far as he could in his car seat toward Luke and began saying to him "we're almost there Baby Luke, we're almost there." Then he patted him on the leg. What a validation that I've really been making a difference all along! My soothing for Alex didn't have an immediate effect, but it resonated inside of him deeply enough to share it with his brother who needed help. Our walk as a Christian works the same way. We don't always know if we're making a difference as we try to set an example for others. In fact it may even seem like things are getting worse. But that is usually when God is working His hardest to bring out the best in every situation. Keep your faith! Hold strong in the word of the Lord and His grace will be yours!

These trials will show that your faith is genuine. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold--though your faith is far more precious than mere gold. So when your faith remains strong through many trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world. - 1 Peter 1:7.

Find YOU in GOD

2011-02-08T21:15:00.000-08:00

It was gym night at our church's school. Kids got a chance to run off some energy with the games set up for them in the gymnasium. It was quite freeing for all of us to be in an area where we didn't have to worry about bouncing balls into a table lamp, or toys that might ricochet off a ceiling fan. Alex loved being able to express his "kid-ness" by running, jumping, throwing, rolling, and even falling while having fun (Luke had fun just watching). He just got to "be." The peace at being who you are fully also comes with living a life following Christ. Imagine not having to make excuses for who you are, or crouch behind things to gain approval. God loves you the way you are now! He doesn't want to see you be consumed by a sinful nature, but you don't have to do anything to win His love. You can ask Him to come into your heart now, and show you His peace.

"For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved." - Romans 10:13.

Managing the Toy Box

2011-02-01T21:18:00.000-08:00

(From juliestaley.com)

What's in your child's toy box? It can actually be quite a black hole for toys, as they get tossed in, and the mass of toys doesn't let it out! That's especially true for the smaller ones that get sifted through the mess and end up on the bottom, pretty much forgotten. What mom has time to clean out the toy box on a regular basis? But there is one time I see those toys get out.....when Alex is alone. When he has to utilize a few minutes alone while I make a phone call, or answer an email, make him something to eat, or do something for Baby Luke. I'll look over and he has taken out things he forgot he had, or even considers they are "new"...only because they were lost in the giant pool of toys. Then he has a new sense of wonder and amazement as he enjoys these toys as if it were the first time.....all because he had the time to himself to find something new. This is exactly how God works. He brings us to circumstances where all we have is ourselves, and we have to dig way deep inside to find things about that we may never have known, or may have forgotten. Try beating God to it, and planning time alone with yourself. Use it to pray and meditate on His will. Show God you are ready to be in the world to follow the plan He has for you to bring you the blessings He has in store.

"Draw close to God, and he will draw close to you" - James 4:8.

Christmas Peace All Year

2011-01-07T19:49:00.001-08:00

(From juliestaley.com)

As we were driving home from church on the early evening of Christmas Eve, I felt a great serenity I hadn't felt in a very long time...a certain calm...a peace that reached deep. I thought perhaps it was part of the overflowing gratitude I have for sharing the celebration of Christ's birth with my children, but I looked around as we drove past the mall and the stores around it to see that they were all closed for Christmas. The parking lots were eerily empty. The usually jammed roads were barely traveled. The glow from the parade of lighted store signs was dim. You see, if you are as old as I am, you remember growing up when malls and most stores were not open on Sundays, and you remember what it felt like to spend Sundays doing one thing: honoring God. The fourth commandment has quietly been pushed aside for a lifestyle that gets you through your "to do" list each day. Today we (me included) are all too busy to keep Sunday open to do nothing but just go to church and maybe go out for lunch. We go to church Saturday night or Sunday morning and then on Sunday we have to cram in all of our weekly errands and chores and trips that we can't take during the week. As an avid shopper, it's thrilling to have the entire two days of the weekend to fill shopping bags and accumulate things I don't need, but it doesn't fill my heart with the Spirit. That peace I felt Christmas Eve was not just a nostalgic feeling from my childhood that I want my children to experience....it is a GIFT FROM GOD that we enjoy a day to settle down with Him and reflect on what's on our mind and in our soul.

"Remember the Sabbath and keep it holy." - Exodus 20:8.

The Season's Reason

2010-12-21T20:40:00.000-08:00

(From Mommy Moments at juliestaley.com. Photo by Caryn Broomby)

Sure we'll always have Santa Claus at Christmas, but I'm having a hard time steering through the commercialism of Christmas as I try to teach my children the true meaning of the holiday. Luke is too little to understand yet, but Alex knows that it's Jesus' birthday. He knows that we give gifts to celebrate because the wise men came bearing gifts for the divine baby. He knows that we put up special lights and a tree to honor Him. But Alex is not clear on how Santa Claus fits into all of this. The sobering part about that is....he's right. I've waited so long for this time to come...to share the excitement and the magic of Santa Claus at Christmastime with my children. But just as start talking to them about Santa, and sharing the folklore of the holiday, I feel an overwhelming sense of guilt. It just feels so unnecessary to lie and tell him a secular figure is going to fulfill his wishes, when in fact the only one who can do that is God. Alex knows exactly why we're celebrating Christmas....to remember a baby born in a manger. So why do we need to share the focus with a jolly ol' man in a red suit? How does that deepen my children's spirituality? Will it deepen their relationship with Christ? Will it help them learn compassion for other people and dedicate their time and resources to helping others? The role of Santa does generate kindheartedness and giving toward others, but it doesn't bring salvation....and if salvation isn't important then why celebrate Christ's birth in the first place? I don't yet know how to share a secular myth with my children that takes attention away from the life of Jesus. What I do know is that as a child I believed wholeheartedly in Jesus Christ and felt his presence with me even before I could read. I also believed with all my heart in Santa...but I knew his magic was only possible through God. So it is in everyday life too...no person can meet all of your needs. No one has the power to bring you the desires of your heart except Jesus. With that, it can be Christmastime all the time!

And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying, “Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace among those with whom he is pleased!” - Luke 2: 13-14.

A Lesson to Care About

2010-11-21T19:41:00.000-08:00

(From juliestaley.com)

"The righteous care for the needs of their animals, but the kindest acts of the wicked are cruel." - Proverbs 12:10

Any pet owner will emphatically tell you that having an animal as your best friend is much like parenting. They'll also tell you that putting that pet down is the hardest thing you'll ever do. A part of you always goes with them. We just went through that with one of our beloved dogs, Chessie. She was 13, and lived a long, spoiled life. The picture is of her with Alex when he was about 9 months old. Chessie was with me during some of my hardest times, and was my baby long before I finally had my boys. At the end she needed help with everything, even walking, going outside, eating and drinking water. Alex was able to watch me care for her, asking many questions. For instance, when I gave her a bath he wanted to rub soap on her and he would even say "she likes it", when she'd tilt her head back to get under her neck. When it was clear she wasn't feeling good, he'd ask if she needed a bath. He now understands something it can take a lifetime to learn: caring. No matter what Chessie did for my life, by being here, my child now knows the importance of caring for others...and not by seeing...by doing.

"Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others."

- Philippians 2:4

Go out and DO something for someone (or some pet)...it will fill your soul with love...the only thing we can take with us to heaven. RIP Chessie. We miss you!

"I also said to myself, 'As for humans, God tests them so that they may see that they are like the animals. Surely the fate of human beings is like that of the animals; the same fate awaits them both: As one dies, so dies the other. All have the same breath; humans have no advantage over animals. Everything is meaningless. All go to the same place; all come from dust, and to dust all return.'” - Ecclesiastes 3:18-20

Proof of God

2010-10-23T14:59:00.000-07:00

When I was going through the turmoil of IVF, I felt so distant from God. My entire adult life, so many surgeries, and I was told I could not get pregnant without infertility treatments. I began to think God could not possibly be real. I felt comfort in moving away from Him, and justifying that the He might not exist. At first when I did this I was relieved because I didn't have to believe any more "lies"....that I would be comforted and God would be there for me and "blah, blah, blah" (is what I thought). Strangely the only thing I could not pull away from was prayer. Even if I imagined I wasn't talking to God....I was talking to "someone". So I kept praying and asked people to pray for me. Finally one night, which was like so many during that time, I was crying myself to sleep, arguing with "whomever" was listening to my prayer, and I realized that my struggle with infertility was not because of my physical problems. It was because of my spiritual problem. My lack of faith in God was keeping a pregnancy from happening. With this epiphany, I prayed for forgiveness and praised God for enlightening me. I knew at that moment I would get pregnant. Four months later through IVF, I did. God proved to me that He was always there, and I was the one who moved away (read about our IVF struggle in the August 20, 2008 blog entry). But the lesson in restoring my faith, was not over. Even though I was hospitalized with a difficult pregnancy and eventually had to deliver a premature baby, we longed to have another child. Again a miracle as I got pregnant naturally....praise God! I didn't even have to ask, it just happened. But I ended up miscarrying. I carried until week 13 when I began to hemorrhage and had to have an emergency surgery (see the blog entry on March 16, 2009). There are no words to describe the pain of pregnancy loss. However during that time instead of feeling resentment toward God, felt a sense of gratitude for all of the other good things He has brought me. I knew the feeling too....it was familiar.....it was the Holy Spirit.

"And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Counselor to be with you forever-- the Spirit of truth. The world cannot accept him, because it neither sees him nor knows him. But you know him, for he lives with you and will be in you." - John 14:16-17.

How much more my faith was strengthened! Through this unimaginable loss, I restored my faith in God through the Holy Spirit! But doubt still crept in as I wondered if I would ever get pregnant again. Was I even supposed to get pregnant again? Did God want that for us? I was set to do another round of IVF when infertility specialists found something unidentified through an MRI and more testing had to be done to see if I had been scarred from the miscarriage. My faith plummeted. I felt like I was back at square one with the same problem I started with. As I was praying about it, I decided to play a bit of my "Bible roulette". I thought if God is real He will tell me right now what is going to happen. I closed my eyes and randomly let my Bible open up to scripture I can meditate on. Here is the verse my finger landed on:

"Listen! The virgin shall conceive a child! She shall give birth to a son, and he shall be called Emmanuel." - Matthew 1:23.

There it was....a message about the miracle of the Christ child's birth, which told me that Jesus is real. I knew then I would get pregnant again on my own. It was the same "knowing" I had when I knew I would get pregnant the first time. About 3 months later, what I knew that day, became real, and I was pregnant for the second time without IVF. It was another difficult and scary pregnancy, but today I do have another son! So God really has been with me through the darkest hours. He was forcing me to question everything so I could learn for myself that He is there.....just as He is for YOU.....the Trinity.....the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Amen.

Pros and Cons

2010-09-05T09:09:00.000-07:00

Every parent should see the 1979 movie Kramer vs. Kramer. Not because it won five academy awards, but because it is a poignant portrayal of the intangibility of parenting. It tells the story of Ted and Joanna Kramer who divorce when they have a young son. Joanna leaves the son with the father to raise while she goes to "find herself". Two years later, she returns, wanting the child back. Ted has put everything he has into being the best parent he can for his child, even sacrificing accounts at work to care for his son. When it's time to go to court, Ted is making a list of pros and cons about fighting for his son. On the cons side, he lists things like how much money legal fees are, and how little free time he has, and how his career has suffered, and so on. The pro side of the list....is empty. He could not write down one tangible reason to fight for this child. But....he still went ahead with it, and went to court. Why? Evidently, what is on the pro side might not be something that can be articulated, but it is something that resonates deep within the soul of a parent. The importance of making a difference in their life, and steering them to be their best. The bliss of the simple things like a hug, a kiss, or an "I love you." What do you think God would put on His list if he made one about you? Perhaps on the con side it would say that you complain too much, or ask for things that are selfish, or surround yourself with materialism. But what would He put on the pro side? Can He say that you honor Him? What about keeping commandments, or even just live full of gratitude for what you do have? Could he ever say you spread that gratitude to others? Do you simply live a life spreading love? It's all He asks. In the New Testament Jesus gave us one commandment "love one another as I have loved you" - John 13:34. Are you following Jesus' request?

The Present of His Presence

2010-08-09T20:01:00.000-07:00

(From juliestaley.com. Photo by Courtney Matevey of Green Apple Photo)

It's amazing what newborn babies can sense right out of the womb. How many times have you rocked a baby to sleep in your arms and then as soon as you put them down they start to cry? Have you ever had a baby stop crying just because you came into the room? Or have the started to cry when you left the room? Somehow they sense that someone like Mommy or Daddy is there. "How" they know can't easily be explained. It just "is". And even if you aren't in their presence, you are most likely doing something out of their sight like preparing a bottle, or getting diapers or a blanket to care for them. It works the same way with God. You can't explain how you know He's there...it just "is". Then of course there are the times when you think you feel His absence. Yet God is never lacking in His care for you! When you feel He is not close, rest assured He is working out of your sight to bring you something you need! He is always caring for you! This is the foundation of faith...knowing that "God is with you in all that you do." - Genesis 21:22.

Welcome Baby Luke!

2010-06-26T13:18:00.000-07:00

(From juliestaley.com)

We give God all the glory for bringing us the miracle of Luke.....Lucas Mueller Staley. We were told by doctors it could not happen without fertility treatments. Jesus replied, "What is impossible with men is possible with God." - Luke 18:27

Where is God?

2010-05-25T08:25:00.000-07:00

(From juliestaley.com)
A mere sunset, the contagious giggles of children, the unexpected kindness of a stranger. It's easy to see God at work when we experience the things in life full of beauty, joy, and love. After going through years of infertility, I now feel every day like my heart could burst with gratitude toward God for bringing Alex to us. God is SO GOOD! But what about the times when you can't see God? Where is your gratitude then? Extreme pain (emotional or physical), needless and perpetual suffering, even abuse or torture of people or animals. Where is He? Where does God go? During the very dark days of my infertility struggle, it was sometimes impossible to believe God was there. I felt so distant from Him. Betrayed. Abandoned. Simply forgotten. But I know now that He WAS there! God was working ahead of me, in a place I could not see, to bring the blessing of Alex to us at just the right moment for His plan. And because I learned that lesson, I knew God was there when I had a miscarriage last year, and felt the presence of the Holy Spirit with me during that time of intense emotional and physical pain. I know that God is working in the pregnancy I have now, despite the complications we're facing. I know God has is in His hands to work something out for His greater good. Could I have believed that if I didn't go through the doubt during my infertility? Certainly not. There are millions of different stories of despair around the world. With starvation, disease, abuse, poverty, war, or even natural disasters, it's easy to say God isn't watching over us like he should. But ask Elie Wiesel, who was sent to a concentration camp as a child during the Holocaust, and was separated from his family, except his father, whom he eventually watched die. Today he says God is in everything. Imagine that! Wiesel writes in his book "Night", about how he still found God during those days...during the days of watching women, children, and innocent friends or family go through horror and death. God was there! Or perhaps you say God couldn't be there when He allows dozens of people to be murdered by a crazed gunman on a college campus? Then just ask Jim Pace who wrote "Should We Fire God?". With all the evidence there is to give God the spiritual pink slip, his conclusion to that is "don't." If you are struggling with cancer, infidelity, financial turmoil, death of a loved one, Brian Jones, author of "Second Guessing God", will tell you that God is always there, "working upstream" to bring blessings and joy to you. One of the biggest tragedies in the world is the incidence of AIDS, with 33 million people infected. Two million of these cases are children. Or an even bigger issue....15 million children a year die of hunger. Where is God in all of that? How can God be in these horrific circumstances if He is all loving? Look hard. God is in the giving and sacrificing that people do to help those in need. God is in the mission trips, the medical staff, and the souls of people working and praying to do what they can to bring healing to others. The trials by fire are what brings us spiritual purity. Calm seas don't make skilled sailors. We navigate through the terrain of life because of the stumbling blocks we learn to walk over. God's allowance of trials brings us unwavering faith as long as you can hang in there! Certainly it doesn't mean we will ever understand the maladies of this existence, but we can accept that God is in everything, and is using what we experience to bring us closer to Him. THAT is God's ultimate plan for our lives.

"What shall we then say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He that didn't spare his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, will he not also give us, with him, all things freely? Who shall bring an accusation against the elect of God? It is God who justifies. Who is he that condemns? It is Christ who died, but, more than that, is risen again, who is even at the right hand of God, who also intercedes for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? It is written, 'For your sake we are killed all the day long, we are accounted as sheep for the slaughter.' But in all these things we more than overcome through him who loved us. For I am persuaded that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to be, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord." - Romans 8:31-39.

The Sincerest Form of Flattery

2010-04-12T21:02:00.000-07:00

(From juliestaley.com)

Children are natural imitators. So it's not surprising in the video here to see Alex trying to imitate his Daddy in playing golf, and can't even wait to get out of his pajamas to do so (Mark and I met on a golf course, so it's been a great hobby for us to enjoy together and on our own). Alex wants to be like Dada so much that he cries when he has to come inside and put away the golf clubs. Then he'll try to golf in the house, which of course has its limitations! The important note is that he never stops. He is eager to learn and be influenced by his father. Why don't we have that kind of passion with God?

"You have taken off your old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator" - Colossians 3:9-10.

Do we cry when we can't continue practicing to live in the image of God the Father? What is it that stops us from making a permanent connection and commitment to living Christ-like and in His image? If that's hard to answer, make a list of what it would take to begin living like that. Chances are your list will compile a plethora of worldly needs....fulfillments of the ego....a playground for Satan. It will entail needs for the future, and compensation for something in the past. Live in the present moment! That is where God's presence exists! God cannot change the past, and your free will, given you by God, determines the future. Commit to imitating Jesus in every way, and there is no doubt your life will grow greatly in blessings and glory!

"We are all to be transformed by the renewing of our minds — conformed not to this world, but to the pattern of Jesus Christ" - Romans 12:2.

Who Paid for You?

2010-04-11T12:02:00.001-07:00

(From juliestaley.com)

Alex is already urging me to explain why I tell him "no". Since he's just starting to have dialogue, this is the beginning of a long period of inquiries to hit Mommy. It's one of the more enlightening duties in parenthood: to answer alot of questions from your child; many that may seem a unnecessary, difficult, or even strange. Looking back, I remember one of the oddest things I ever asked my mother when I was a kid. I was obsessed with medical shows and watched them intently (my favorite was "Emergency 51"). One show had an issue about a couple who couldn't pay the hospital after they had a baby and there was some issue about discharging the mother and baby. I believed from watching this (at only 5 or 6 years old) that you had to actually pay money for a baby....like there was a price tag on it....not knowing there was something called health insurance. So I asked my mother how much I cost. She was a little confused at the question and I explained I wanted to know how much they had to pay for me at the hospital like the people on TV did. Of course she laughed and told me as simply as she could that it wasn't the baby they were paying for, it was the medical services. What a great world we live in, I thought, that every baby is free! Yet, that is not accurate at all. Every person born has already been paid for by God. The price of your everlasting life is shown in the blood of Christ. Jesus paid for your life with His. God made the ultimate sacrifice, giving His son to die so you never have to! I look forward to teaching my son, and eventually his brother, that their lives, like everyone else's, are already paid for. By acknowledging and accepting that, they will never have to die!

"For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus our Lord" - Romans 6:23.

A Christian New Year

2010-03-31T19:43:00.000-07:00

(From juliestaley.com, Caryn Broomby photo)

As we've reached Maundy Thursday I begin to honor Passion week as my very own "New Year in Christ." Since Christ died for my sins and yours, I like to reflect on the past year and how I've grown, or not grown, with God, and what steps I need to take to stay on the course. Now, as a mother, I have the added task of teaching my child, and eventually his brother, that they need to do the same. It is sometimes difficult to find that truth deep inside that we have not measured up to Christ's example. However without reflection on our mistakes, we cannot learn, and then become stagnant in a relationship that is ever-changing on His part! So, my heart is always heavy this time of year because of this spiritual assessment. I anguish in the thought that Christ spent His final hours at the Last Supper with his disciples by washing their feet, serving and loving in humility. Have I served and loved all in humility? Certainly not. On Good Friday I mourn the cruel death of a man who brought unconditional love to everyone he met, including lepers and even prostitutes. Have I brought unconditional love to everyone I've met? Certainly not. Then on Easter morning, a miracle happens every year. Not only is Christ brought to life again, to unconditionally love and serve every human in God's creation, but through His painful death, His love has wiped my sins clean! I have a chance to make amends and strengthen my walk as a Christian. I pray that each year, as I learn and grow, that I will move closer to being the person God intended, and showed through His son's example on Earth.

"After taking the cup, he gave thanks and said, “Take this and divide it among you. For I tell you I will not drink again of the fruit of the vine until the kingdom of God comes. And he took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, “This is my body given for you; do this in remembrance of me.” - Luke 22:17-19.

What Door Do You Close?

2010-03-01T20:05:00.000-08:00

(From juliestaley.com)

Every parent knows the sign that their child is about to do something they shouldn't. Sometimes they simply go in another room, or get really quiet, or crawl under a table to hide. With Alex, I can tell he's up to something when he shuts the door to a room. It's even more evident when I try to open the door and he's holding it shut! If I open the door and come into the room before he has carried out his plan he always has the most guilt-ridden look on his face, like I already caught him in the act. Sometimes, he'll even try to push me out the door, so he can get on with his plan. As cute as it is to hear stories like this, I bet it's also something you, yourself, do with God. Think about it. For the most part you can just label it "denial." How many times have you planned to do something, yet you knew, way deep inside that it was something that would not honor your relationship with God? It's even harder if you feel pressured to do something because of your surroundings. Life gets tricky when you're around people who don't put the Lord first, and you feel you have to fight fire with fire, so you might get drug down to another level...one where you know you've shut the door so God can't see what you're doing. The truth is, it just makes things worse because you now have to answer to God about why you didn't act with a higher moral standard, along with suffering the guilt of it all. It's always easier to be out in the open and always do the right thing. Taking the high road gives you an incredible view of the beauty of life!

"But if we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ His Son cleanses us from all sin. If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say that we have not sinned, we make Him a liar, and His word is not in us." - 1 John 1:7-10.

Dishing It Out

2010-02-17T21:00:00.000-08:00

(From juliestaley.com)

Emptying the dishwasher is one of my most loathsome tasks to do around the house. It's made even less desirable lately because whenever I open it up, Alex is right there taking dishes out. It's worrisome when there are breakables and knives to get a hold of. It eventually became quite frustrating because I had to schedule all my dishwasher transactions around Alex's naptime. I always had dirty dishes sitting in the sink! Finally the other day I decided to surrender. I loaded the dishwasher so all Alex could reach were plastics. That way, as I unloaded the rest, he would be kept busy, and I didn't have to fret. Imagine how shocked I was to find that as I put away all of the breakables, Alex pulled out all of his dishes and actually put them either in or near the cabinet they belonged! I was humbled because all he wanted to do was help Mommy. He wasn't trying to get in the way, he wanted to make it easier for me to get something done. Now, this one thing I have disliked so much has turned into a fun activity that builds a bond with my child, and gets done in half the time! So imagine, what if we were to surrender struggles in our life like this to God? He is always trying to help us through tough situations, but many times we don't just step aside and let Him do His work. What He is capable of is beyond our imagination, so allowing Him to work for us, brings answers to prayer that we never though possible! Whatever it is that you struggle with, bring it to God and let Him turn it around.

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." - Matthew 11:28-30.

Got Plans?

2010-02-03T11:53:00.000-08:00

As I was lying on my bed watching TV, Alex came in and starting piling toys next to me. There were quite a few, including a couple of books. It was a little unfomfortable lying there with them all around me, and I could see all of them crashing to the ground as the pile got higher and higher! Mommy of course would be the one to pick them all up. So as I started putting them on the floor, Alex would pick each one up and put them back on the bed. It became quite a cycle for a couple of minutes with me putting them down and Alex putting them up. A little frustrated, I said to Alex "what are you doing buddy?" He then gestured to me that he wanted up on the bed. So I put him up there with me where he began to move all of his toys around and play with them. He had a plan! All he wanted was to get his toys on the bed so he could play while sitting right next to Mommy! It was really very cute of him. As simple as that incident is, God works in the same manner. He has a plan for all of us, yet many times we try to move away what He has put in our lives in order to move closer to us. Sometimes things He puts in our lives are inconvenient and don't make any sense to us at the time. However once His plan has relvealed itself, it is clear that is was cleverly thought out. Watch for those signs in your life that God is putting something there to guide you where He needs you to do His work!

"A man’s heart plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps." Proverbs 16:9

Praying For Cheese

2010-01-14T10:50:00.000-08:00

(From juliestaley.com)

In this video, you can hear Alex trying to pray. It's not very distinguishable; all he gets out is "Dear God." A good start for not even being 2 years old, I'd say. It may seem insignificant now, but the power of what he is doing will be immeasurable, with the effects for him, and possibly others down the road being eternal. The power of prayer is proven over and over again in stories we hear nearly every day. God answers every prayer! It may not be in your time frame, or in the manner you wished, but the answer always comes. Still, many people pray constantly about something that they never see an answer to. What can you do to get God's attention? It's simple. Just learn how to have a dialogue with God. Speak to Him in prayer, then listen to Him in meditation. And remember that your prayer has to be coming from your soul....not your ego. If something you want is in your soul, that means it was put there by God, and He will surely bring it to you.

"Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." - Psalms 37:4.

"Whatever you ask in my name, this I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask me anything in my name, I will do it." - John 14:13-14

However if you are asking for something that is coming from your ego, out of pride or fear, then no amount of prayer will bring it to fruition. In fact, God could even bring you a lesson in humility just to cancel out your ego. Another point to remember is that God brings things to you in His time, not ours. I prayed my whole life to be a mother. When it wasn't happening, I just simply prayed that God remove the desire from my heart to be a mother. When he didn't, after many years, I knew a child has to be on its way. At age 40....it finally was. At 41 a miscarriage. At 42 now another healthy pregnancy. Why did it take so long for God to answer a prayer that He knew would be fulfilled? It was to teach me lessons in how to appreciate being a mother, and give me the skills I needed to be a better mother than I could have years before. The waiting is difficult, but know that in that waiting, God is setting you up for something awesome!! Also remember in prayer to always be grateful. Praise God with every bit of gratitude you can for all He has provided you, even if it is as simple as a piece of cheese. Along with that, don't forget to include prayer for people you know are in need. Praying for others, immediately releases what we need to bring blessings to ourselves.

"If your enemy is hungry, give him bread to eat, and if he is thirsty, give him water to drink,

for you will heap burning coals on his head, and the Lord will reward you." — Proverbs 25:21-22

Listen Up

2010-01-10T10:19:00.000-08:00

(juliestaley.com)

If you weren't a good listener before becoming a mom, you sure learn once you have a child. When you have an infant, all you do is listen to how they cry....for hunger, for sleep, for changing, for attention. Then your listening skills change as your child grows. Like many moms do with their children, I've learned how to distinguish many things with Alex. Sometimes I can tell if he's opening a cabinet to his toys or opening the cabinet right next to it with dishes in it. I can also tell from a distance if Alex is rustling around the pages of one of his books, or one of my magazines. I can even tell sometimes which toy he is using to bang on another toy. It may not be what I want to hear, but it is what I need to hear to make me a better mother! Many moms do it quickly and easily. It doesn't take much to hear what your child is doing, it just takes some tweaking of how hear. And what could be more important than hearing exactly what your child is up to? How about hearing what God wants for you? What is more important than listening to his command? So many people find it difficult to hear God because they don't develop the skills to listen to Him. Like listening to your children, it's not difficult to hear God's conversations with you; you just have to adjust. Certainly though, you won't be able to hear God if your mind is noisy. That is why prayer and meditation work wonders. With prayer, you can speak to God. With meditation, you hear God speaking to you. I can't hear Alex if our house is noisy, so I keep noise to a minimum....television, radio, it's all turned down or off. Turn off the unecessary noises in your mind and really listen to God! Then, heed whatever direction he puts you in. You cannot be blessed if you are not on His path! It may not be what you want to hear, but it will make you a better person!

"Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says." - James 1:22

The Miracle of the Season

2009-12-27T17:49:00.000-08:00

No time than any other do the miracles of God seem so real than they do at this time of year. God must be working overtime on miracles, as we've had our third happen now. Our first, was with the birth of Alex...conceived after seven in-vitro procedures, and a complicated first and third trimester. He was delivered five weeks premature (see the August 20, 2008 blog entry). Our second miracle was when I got pregnant earlier this year, with no IVF (see the March 16, 2009 blog entry). It was an impossibility turned upside down! Doctors said I'd never be able to get pregnant on my own. However, it was no surprise to us when it became clear that the pregnancy was not viable and I would miscarry. Stunned, we just remained grateful for all God gave us in Alex. We even set up another IVF treatment for January. But God had other plans! In October I found out that I am pregnant again! We crept through the first several weeks with me on bed rest, as complications arose. Now, after numerous tests, we're in the second trimester with a strong, healthy baby and mama! It's all happening so fast now....two natural pregnancies in one year! So why then was it so hard to get to this point? I have been praying for the miracle of motherhood for years, and all of a sudden God pours out this abundance. I believe God holds back from us to keep us grateful. How could we ever thank Him for what we have if we don't know there's a chance we couldn't have it, or He could take it back from us? How better can He show His greatness than by giving us exactly what we ask for in His name? Is there something you're asking for in God's name? He surely is answering you! It could be "no". It could be "not yet". Or it could someday even be "yes". I assure you if it is a desire put in your heart by God for His glory, it will make its way to you someday. Keep praying! Miracles do happen no matter what time of the year!

"And Jesus said unto them, Because of your unbelief: for verily I say unto you, If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you." - Matthew 17:20.

There's No Place Like Home This Thanksgiving

2009-11-25T16:30:00.000-08:00

(from juliestaley.com) I remember watching The Wizard of Oz for the very first time as a young child, and how spectacular the story was that a girl could instantly be pulled from her home and end up in a foreign fantasy land. I was also scared for Dorothy because I felt like she would never get back home with that old Wicked Witch chasing her around. So I was nearly holding my breath when she got ready to fly away in the balloon with the Wizard to go back to Kansas. But it didn't happen. Then with just a wave of the wand and a click of Dorothy's ruby red heels Glinda sent her home in an instant. What? All that time, all that drama, and it only took that one motion to get back to Kansas? I was pretty disappointed that I watched the whole movie only to see how easy it was, and that Dorothy, with Glinda's help had the power inside of her the whole time to go back home. So why did Glinda make her go through being chased by the Wicked Witch when she could have gone home so soon? A ha....it sounds familiar doesn't it? Sounds like something you might ask God. Why would He make us go through trials, loss, and frustration, when at any time our problems can be dissolved away with just the wave of his hand? He is actually trying to teach us something while he works on a solution to make things better than we could imagine on our own. I see that in raising Alex too. Sometimes he needs to learn that certain things don't work one way. Even though I have the power to help make whatever it is better, there are time that I wait to let him figure it out for himself. It is a true confidence builder. What a great lesson he learns! So this Thanksgiving, don't just be thankful for the things you have....give thanks for the troubles that stir, and know that as long as you are praying about it, that God is working his magic to make things better for you. All you need to do is believe!!

Consider it wholly joyful, my brethren, whenever you are enveloped in or encounter trials of any sort or fall into various temptations. Be assured and understand that the trial and proving of your faith bring out endurance and steadfastness and patience. But let endurance and steadfastness and patience have full play and do a thorough work, so that you may be [people] perfectly and fully developed [with no defects], lacking in nothing.

-James 1:2-4

Buggin'

2009-11-08T19:54:00.000-08:00

I let Alex outside to play recently on one of our unusually warm afternoons, and instead of heading to his playset, he ended up trying to examine all of the ladybugs! They were all over the house and the patio so it was hard to miss them. He would pick them up and examine these tiny creatures very thoroughly as their wings fluttered around and they just flew away. He was so proud of discovering them that he held one up for me to take this picture of (although it's hard to see on the left side of his hand)! I wasn't thrilled about the idea of my baby boy playing with "bugs", but how else will he learn about the world God has created around him unless he is allowed to explore even those (safe) things I like to stay away from? How else will he understand that there are many things that are so unlike him? How will he learn to celebrate that uniqueness? Many people are tired of seeing all of these ladybugs because they have descended on our area like a plague of locusts. But just like YOU, God has a purpose for them and them only. Ladybugs are a gardener's friend because they eat so many other insects...so seeing them here means they are thinning out other swarms of insects. So appreciate their presence! God intends for us to enjoy what he has created...in all of its diversity. Honoring those things, honors you! For it is in celebrating the specialness of other things, that we are actually celebrating the specialness of ourselves.

"How many are your works, O LORD! In wisdom you made them all; the earth is full of your creatures. There is the sea, vast and spacious, teeming with creatures beyond number‑‑living things both large and small." - Psalm 104:24-25.

Imitating Life

2009-10-19T20:02:00.000-07:00

(from juliestaley.com)

If you watch this video, you can see that Alex has gained several skills at home to help Mommy each day. From cleaning the floor, to letting out the dogs, or even putting things in the dryer (not sure why he chose dog food!), not one of them are things that we ever taught Alex (especially the dog food!), or even thought he understood when we did them with him around. Each of these tasks he just started doing completely on his own! How does this happen? Imitation. Children are masters at it. This speaks volumes as a parent to see how much of what you do rubs off on your child...things you take for granted or even things you don't think anyone notices. But children do. How important is it then that your actions every day must honor God? If children are imtating you...then who should you be imitating?

"Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God." - Ephesians 5:1-2

Hunger for Life

2009-09-21T20:34:00.000-07:00

(juliestaley.blogspot.com)

Children naturally love to laugh and smile....even at the simplest task. Many parents can relate with stories of their children playing games and giggling at times they should be paying attention to something, like when they're at the dinner table, or even church! I feel like no matter what the setting, the smiles and laughter that Alex shows me every day are addictive. But the Norman Rockwell life we lead in America, is pretty much an anomaly. Consider that there are about 6.7 billion people on the planet. The United States is part of a group of approximately 65 high-income nations with a combined population of about 1 billion people....less that a sixth of the world's population. That means our culture of affluence is not experienced on most of the planet! Look up just about anywhere and you'll find that roughly one billion people are considered "hungry". Every day 16,000 children die of hunger....that is one child every five seconds (by the time you finish reading this, about a dozen children will have died from starvation). It angers me to know this, to see it on TV or the internet. How can God bring such joy to some children, and such pain and suffering to others? Mainly, so He can demonstrate His love through the compassion of people who help those in need. By reaching out, you not only bring relief to a child, you bring Jesus into their soul. So, teaching your child the importance of helping hungry children, is a gift that will bring your child a deep inner peace, and to those they help, a deep love of God. Helen Keller said "although the world is full of suffering it is also full of the overcoming of it... Believe, when you are most unhappy, that there is something for you to do in the world. So long as you can sweeten another's pain, life is not in vain." So it is, that I pray every day my child will bring Jesus to the hearts of others. Randy Alcorn writes in his book "If God is Good", that a world without suffering would create spiritual apathy. How true! But this is actually an oxymoron because spirituality begs compassion. It is our inborn spirit that creates that longing to help others...at any age. I remember as a child, about 8 or 9 years old, my mother sponsored a child from the CARE organization. I was surprised to know it was so easy to reach out to a child in need. We got a photo of the little boy and got updates from him through the mail. It showed me that helping others was just a postage stamp away. Today it's even faster. Through the internet, you can help a child instantly.....and possibly save a life.

"In humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others." - Philippians 2:3-4.

An American Lesson

2009-09-04T13:16:00.000-07:00

(juliestaley.blogspot.com)

The President of the United States is scheduled to make an address to the nation's children next week to urge them to work hard in school. I remember having to watch Presidential speeches when I was in school. They were mandatory because we had to write a report about them. The President's words were always a point to learn from. Apparently thousands of American children won't learn about what their President says to them next week because some school districts have decided against airing the telecast, or making it optional, depending on what each child's parents decide. This is not just shocking to me, but shows the sad state of irreverence and respect this nation seems to hold toward people in authority. Republicans are arguing that Obama's speech is going to be a tool to tout his social agenda, and are calling for the speech to be cancelled. I am a Republican and all I have to say is "are you kidding me?" The leader of our country wants to reach out to give students a little encouragement (have you seen our dropout rates?), and all we can think of is our fear that he might interject his political platform? I have interviewed Obama on occasion when he was an Illinois legislator, and he is an extremely straightforward guy. If he says he's planning to talk to students about school, I believe he's going to stick to that. However, even if he does not, is it not his liberty as the President of the United States to tell the nation his view on certain issues? Sure, there is a better venue to bring up those points, but even coupled with an address to help school children, it doesn't matter, children need to hear more from their leaders who are taking an interest in THEM. This speech is important in teaching children about the value of education, working hard, and coming together. God is not a Democrat or a Republican. He teaches us to love one another no matter what. Harmony in the midst of diversity....that is the key to inner peace. God created a universe of diversity, and we should be grateful and flourish in the richness of it all. But perhaps the bigger lesson for students to learn here is to respect those we put in authority. If not, how will they ever respect the teachers trying to help them get through school? He is only 18 months old now, so my son Alex will start preschool when Barack Obama is still in office. I will make sure my child knows that our President is behind him to put all he can into education...the ticket to becoming anything you want...like, President of the United States.

"Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave, free; but Christ is all, and in all." - Colossians 3:11

A Children's Channel

2009-08-16T20:20:00.000-07:00

(from juliestaley.blogspot.com)

It was an amazing ride working in television news. I covered U.S. Presidents, celebrities, natural disasters, and countless of stories of what is making change in a community. It taught me how to find elements that will grab attention and keep people wanting to come back to see more. That made it pretty competitive. There was little room for anything mediocre because it was too easy for viewers to change the channel. So imagine if you had a viewers who never wanted to change the channel. What if you had viewers who always thought what you were showing them was the best thing they could watch, and they didn't even think about a different program? How about viewers who only wanted good news; things that uplifted their spirit and helped them grow as a human? That's exactly what you get as a parent. You get to marvel in the mundane. Instead of getting excited about covering the President's visit to town, you get excited about a little boy eating all of his carrots. And THIS is what God gets excited about: people caring about the growth and development of other people. You don't have to broadcast a celebrity sighting to get God's attention. All you need passion for reaching out to other people enough to show them the little things are what counts the most!

"So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God." - 1 Corinthians 10:31.

Water of Life

2009-08-03T21:03:00.000-07:00

(juliestaley.blogspot.com) Alex just finished the last of his summer swimming class for babies. He absolutely loved it! I don't know if it was the splashing, the floating, mommy bouncing him around, or just being around other babies his age, but he laughed and smiled the whole way through. He even liked getting dunked under water. His daddy won lots of ribbons growing up as a swimmer, so perhaps we have a talent that comes naturally. It's all fun now with mommy and daddy holding him, and keeping him buoyant. What Alex really thinks about swimming will reveal itself when he has to swim all alone with no water wings, or mommy and daddy holding him. Will he be scared? Or will we have given him the lessons he needs to keep himself afloat? The same can be said about growing in your faith. We are teaching our child the importance of a relationship with God, with all the fun of singing "Jesus Loves Me", and reading his Baby Bible that uses pictures to tell stories. But when those are gone, and Alex will make his own decisions about God, for us it will be just as scary as letting go of him in the swimming pool. Yet...I know that if I teach him well now, like he is learning in swim class, he will have all of the skills he will need to let God lead him through life with peace and joy at the center of it all.

“Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose trust is the Lord. He is like a tree planted by water, that sends out its roots by the stream, and does not fear when heat comes, for its leaves remain green, and is not anxious in the year of drought, for it does not cease to bear fruit.” —Jeremiah 17:5-8

Stop and Smell the Flowers

2009-07-14T19:51:00.000-07:00

(juliestaley.blogspot.com)

It sure is a good feeling to get things done ahead of time! Planning ahead relieves the anxiety of getting something done at the last minute, and risking not getting done at all. It is vital to plan ahead when you're a mom! It's also important to teach your children how to plan ahead and be responsible for getting tasks done. But what if you just stopped to simply take in life? What if you smelled the flowers or listened to the hum of nature? How would you find time for that? Moreover, how would you even teach your children to do the same? It's simple when you consider that life is made up of the moment you are in now. Not even God can change the past, and the future is something that can never be pinned down. Only this moment, right now, is in your control. When you are trying to control anything but the present moment, you are living an illusion. It's simple to experience life the way God made it...one moment at a time...by turning to the Bible. "Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow brings troubles of its own. Today's troubles are enough for today." - Matthew 6:34.

Music Matters

2009-06-28T20:38:00.000-07:00

(juliestaley.blogspot.com)

During a week that the world is mulling over how one person has made a meteoric change in the music industry, it has highlighted what I have always known is true: how vital music is in speaking to the soul, and the earlier you start, the more you can open the heart. We all know how much children love songs. From the time they are born, we sing them a lullaby...trying to bond through music. As they grow, we teach them about the world through song: their alphabet, how to go to sleep (Twinkle Twinkle Little Star), even how to take a bath (in my childhood it was Ernie singing Rubber Ducky from Sesame Street). Studies show a link between music and aptitude, which has brought about music classes for babies. Alex loves it! He lights up at the music we sing at home after we learn it in class. Even in Alex's baby swimming class, he is introduced to the water through songs that encourage aquatic motion. What is it about music that speaks to the soul? Obviously one reason is because music transcends our existence. As it is on earth, so it is in heaven! Throughout the Bible you can see reference to music to glorify God. Centuries ago, gifted composers wrote elaborate music just for church...just to speak to our soul. I remember one of the first times I got Alex to smile was when he was just several weeks old and I sang the alphabet song to him. I can't explain why it was only that song that got him to smile, but now, at almost 17 months, when I sing that song, he still smiles! This weekend we took Alex to the "Moms That Rock!" concert on Lake Springfield. It was a benefit for CARE, so it was an innovative way to use music to help humanity. The first songs they played were for children, and Alex paid close attention to it, getting right up to the band to listen! I snapped this photo of him clapping to the music! I only hope music will continue to touch his soul, so he can bring blessings to others note by note.

"Shout for joy O heavens; rejoice O earth; burst into song O mountains! For the Lord comforts his people and he will have compassion for his afflicted ones." - Isaiah 49:13.

Happy Father's Day 2009

2009-06-18T20:18:00.000-07:00

(juliestaley.blogspot.com)

We are finding now that even though he doesn't speak many words, Alex sure knows the meaning of almost everything. A few examples: Ask him if we need to change his diaper, and he crawls up the stairs to his nursery. Ask him if he wants to go bye bye and he walks to the door. Ask him if he wants to read a book and he goes to pick one out. So our son knows the meaning of what we are saying....except....the word "no"! Just saying "no" seems to encourage Alex to do more of what he's doing! Apparently we are not alone, as many children seem to follow this trait! For now, it's cute, and somewhat of a game. But the time will come shortly when Alex will need to trust that Mommy and Daddy are telling him not to do something because we are looking out for him. He'll have to learn to trust us, just as we have to learn to trust our Heavenly Father. How long does that take? For some of us, a lifetime. Knowing deep down that God is always working on your behalf is sometimes a difficult lesson to learn. But oh, the pure joy life holds for you when you have that realization...even if it does take a lifetime! Hopefully for our sake, and our son's, we hope it won't take that long for him to learn not to put his hand in the dog bowl...or eat food off the floor....or take something out of the garbage....or pull things out of cabinets....

"Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father?" - Hebrews 12:7

The Lesson of Now

2009-06-06T12:05:00.001-07:00

(juliestaley.blogspot.com)

We're in that oh-so-fun stage now where Alex has started to walk and explore everything. He has great freedom and power in walking, especially in his room where he likes to climb out of his big boy bed and walk to the door and open it! I wasn't so upset that he was able to get out of his room since I had a baby gate up, and can hear him on the monitor (I'm a light sleeper). What needed to change was his insistence that he not stay in his bed. I would put him in it, walk out of the room, and he'd get right out and go to the door. So I'd come in, unemotional, pick him up, put him back in bed, and go back out. This cycle repeated one night for 3 hours. It only took a couple of sleepless nights for me to decide as a walker he just wasn't ready for the big bed (even though he's slept in it without incident for several months now). So he's back in the crib, and has adjusted pretty quickly. I was very excited when he went to the big boy bed, but now I'm excited to get some sleep! It won't be the first time that something will come to Alex before his time and he might have to take a step back and re-address the situation when he's ready. Luckily for all of us, God never brings us something until we need it! You can be certain that He allows things to come into our lives at the exact moment it is necessary. Even if it seems it's too soon, or too late, it only means that we are learning a lesson from it. The timing isn't the focus, it's what you learn from it that should be emphasized. I think I've learned here to be more flexible. The big bed worked at first (he did not like his crib), but now, as backwards as it is, the crib is the best thing for him...until he can climb out of that!

"Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time." 1 Peter 5:6.

Grow and Go

2009-06-01T20:34:00.000-07:00

(From juliestaley.blogspot.com)

Alex is getting around pretty well these days. He can walk, is able to go up and down stairs by himself, and even has his own "cars" he scoots around on in the house. For Mommy (and Daddy), that means he's learning how to get away! Luckily he makes sure I'm always in eyesight, but certainly one day that will come all too soon, he will be out in the world on his own, without Mommy, without my guidance. Alex will be thinking for himself, and making his own impact on the world, even as a toddler. That's when the seeds I plant today begin to sprout. It's scary thinking that my imperfections are included in Alex's blueprint on relating to the world. So it's important to show him that unconditional love, patience, and kindness can overcome any situation.

"I pray that they grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord." - 2 Peter 3:18

It's My Life

2009-05-21T21:42:00.000-07:00

(Facebook, LinkedIn, and Plaxo users can find this entry at juliestaley.blogspot.com)

They say raising children is the hardest job you'll ever love! I think what can be so difficult for some mothers isn't the mundane everyday chores of it, like feeding, bathing, entertaining, but the pressing feeling that you are becoming someone else. For me, I love it! I love that I am letting go of my old self, in order to create a new person....or rather, two new people: my child, and me as a mom! I have never been happier or more fulfilled than I am mothering this little boy. It's a whole new life for me, a whole new cycle and way of doing things. For me, this is not even work, it's my purpose in life...God's purpose for me to let Him work through me. I never felt I was glorifying God to the fullest in any other position I've had in life. God means for us to start things new in order to find what really fills our soul.

"He that finds his life shall lose it: and he that loses his life for my sake shall find it." - Matthew 10:39

A Little Help

2009-05-09T20:53:00.000-07:00

Alex might be on his way to being quite a little helper around the house. If you check out this video, you can see how he's figured out on his own to already load the dryer! The best kind of help of course comes when we don't even ask for it. It is already there, waiting to be used. A relationship with God is just like that. He makes it so simple for us to rely on Him! Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight." -Proverbs 3:5-6

What Do You Need?

2009-05-07T18:47:00.000-07:00

My challenge right now is figuring out exactly what Alex is trying to communicate to me. At 15 months, he's at an age where he knows what is going on around him, but doesn't talk. He knows a couple of signs and responds to several words when I ask him about something. What I'm finding out is he doesn't always "want" something, sometimes he's just trying to get attention! It feels the same way trying to figure out what God wants from me too. Many times He's trying to communicate with me, but I'm not recognizing the signs. As Christians (and as mothers) we have to learn what to look for, and use our intuition as to what we're supposed to know. I feel with God is helps me to grow closer to Him, and learn more about my faith. As a mother, it helps me grow closer to my son, and learn more about my relationship with him.

"My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me." - John 10:27

Set An Example

2009-04-26T21:07:00.000-07:00

(Facebook and LinkedIn users can find this note on juliestaley.blogspot.com)

Mothers long that their children are raised with the right influences to make a positive difference in the world. What seems logical is to surround them with friends, church, school, social activities, whatever it takes to show them the right path. He's only 14 months old, but I've found myself scurrying to always put Alex in the right environment, until I realized that the best thing he can get is simply a mother who sets the right example. Instead of me showing him how the world should work around him, I should show him through my actions how to work around his world to make a positive difference. Leading by example is not only the most influential way to teach something, but it is also the directive of Christ Himself:

I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you. - John 13:15

International Motherhood

2009-04-18T20:52:00.001-07:00

(Facebook and LinkedIn users can find this posting at juliestaley.blogspot.com)
If you're looking for an international experience, you may only have to look as far as your hometown. Mark and I took Alex to eat at a local Japanese restaurant, and we were seated at a hibachi table with an Asian Indian family with two boys, and an African-American couple. None of us knew the other before the meal, and for a few minutes it was a somewhat awkward to be seated at the same table as two other families who were worlds apart in many ways. It was very quiet to say the least! Our chef and waitress were both Asian. Alex was the only baby at the table, and because of that, quickly got the attention of the Indian and African-American women. Conversation began across the table as they asked about his age, his name, and what food he likes to eat. As babies often do, Alex got alot of smiles. The Asian waitress spoke with us about Alex on several occasions at the table, mentioning her 4 year old daughter at several points, and talking about the joys and challenges of raising a child. At one point she was beaming about her daughter and asked if Alex liked ice cream, and I said yes, and she promptly brought him out a dish of it! These were all small, seemingly insignificant exchanges, yet they are bound by the duty and joy that we all have as mothers...no matter what your race, culture, or beliefs. We sat down as strangers, and when the meal ended, we said goodbye as if we were friends. Friends in motherhood, I suppose. I am grateful that in America we can break bread with people who are nothing like us, and learn how unique...yet so much alike...we all are!
There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. - Galatians 3:8.

A Baby Bond

2009-04-13T15:28:00.000-07:00

There is one thing in life that gains incredible value as you get older, although finding the right amount of it exactly when you need it can be difficult....we're talking about friendship. How many of us remember in school saying we'd be "friends forever"? Yet how many of those friends do you still have? Today Mark and I value our old friends like family. They are a part of you that cannot be taken away. Even if you don't see some friends, the memories you have with them never ceases. Alex's newest friend is little 8 month old Emanuel, who lives in Florida. Our families have been friends for years, and finally the two babies got to meet a couple of weeks ago. What a joy to know memories are already forming and Alex has made a friend he'll know for his whole life!
Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up. - Ecclesiasties 4:9-10.

Hello and Goodbye

2009-03-16T18:28:00.000-07:00

According to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, up to 25% of clinically recognized pregnancies result in miscarriages. Chemical pregnancies (where the egg has not implanted) are estimated to have a 75% miscarriage rate. These are shocking numbers for women trying to conceive. Yet they are comforting statistics to women who have lost a pregnancy, so they know they are not alone. Women...like me. I found out in January that I was pregnant again. How exciting! Our first pregnancy was through in-vitro fertilization (our 7th attempt), so the fact that we conceived naturally this time was stunning. It was probably one of the most emotionally bonding moments my husband and I share, to learn we had done this on our own. However, by the 8th week, I was already spotting, and it was clear that the pregnancy was not viable. I was told I would miscarry at any time, and was briefed on what will happen and what to do. But this was not the worst part of it. I carried this child for another four and a half weeks. Every day I would get up, wondering if I would go to bed pregnant that night. I was scared to go anywhere or do anything, for fear the miscarriage would happen away from home. But life had to go on. I even had to go on vacation for 2 and a half weeks, knowing the pregnancy could end at any minute. Shortly after I returned from that trip, I had a national conference to attend over the weekend for Christian moms. I had been spotting that week, and the day I left, it started getting heavier. I knew this pregnancy would end within the weekend. I didn't want to leave. I prayed about it, and quite strangely enough, felt that God wanted me to be at this conference. Even though I felt I was taking a huge risk, it was unmistakable that God's direction to me was to go. As soon as I arrived at the conference it was clear why God wanted me there. I was surrounded by 5,000 Christian moms from across the country and Europe. I had inquiries about my pregnancy, which were difficult to answer, but I was filled with the Spirit so much during this conference! My heart was open to what God had in store, as the mom of one child, or more. I felt such gratitude just to be a mom...and gratitude to be pregnant again...even if for a short time! Being filled with the Spirit like that helped me the last day I was there, when I began bleeding even more heavily. I was sure by the end of that day, I would not be pregnant when I went to bed. That evening, about 10 minutes before I arrived home, the cramping began....just days shy of my 13th week of pregnancy. Like clockwork....God's clockwork....the miscarriage was here...and I was at home. It was evident within the hour that I needed to go to the hospital because I was bleeding uncontrollably. It took 6 hours in the E.R. for doctors and nurses to stop it. Ultimately, I had surgery in the middle of the night...and it was all over. There I was. No pregnancy. No child from it. And surprisingly, no resentment. I was still full of gratitude. I even took time to go down my mental prayer list and lift up friends I knew who were struggling with burdens. My heart had been opened so much during the Christian moms conference that it cancelled out any fears or concerns I was having about the miscarriage. I was purely filled with the Holy Spirit. Had it happened any other day, I could have perhaps broken down in a frenzy during this process. But only God could plan it so that I could feel I was in His arms the entire time, grateful for His love, and grateful for what he has given me: a fabulous husband, an awesome son, a supportive family and friends, and the promise that the child that I can't be with now is cared for and loved forever.

"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you. Before you were born I set you apart for my holy purpose." - Jeremiah 1:5

"I will never forget you. I have carved you in the palm of my hand." - Isaiah 49:15

(I would like to thank the obstetricians and each of their staff who helped me through this exciting, then devastating time...Dr. Donna Sweetland, Dr. Gretchen Byrkit, and Dr. Ernest Ertmoed.)

Traveling Thoughts

2009-03-05T11:38:00.000-08:00

It really goes without saying that going on vacation before you have children, is radically different than when you are a parent. That's exactly what I found during the recent trip we just took without Alex. Before this trip, I had not been away from Alex more than 5 hours. We were gone for 16 days! Vacation has always meant that I could really relax, unwind, and completely forget about whatever plagued me at home (mainly work). Travel was such an escape. But when I got to Maui, I found that it was hard to focus on what was there (just lush paradise, that's all ;)). All I could think about was my baby boy! I knew he was in good hands, because he was with my family, all of whom he adores. He adjusted well, and was very happy. So why was I so hung up about it? Turns out, as I mulled it over, I realized that since my vacations are a way to let go of stress for the demanding job I had...now, without that career, and having a new job as a mommy, there was nothing to "let go". I have already been living with the freedom I needed to celebrate each day because of my fulfillment as a mother. Going on vacation takes me away from that! What can I take away from this to apply in my life and Alex's? Perhaps not to leave him home anymore! :) Realistically, it is that God is lighting my path. He is showing me what is meaningful...that nothing can compare to the time I spend with my child. Sure, I'll have trips away from Alex again. But then, God will have different lessons to teach me...so I can pass them on to my son.

"God, teach me lessons for living so I can stay the course.” - Psalm 119:33.

You Are What You Eat

2009-02-16T17:26:00.000-08:00

I always wondered as a kid why my mother studied so intently what food I ate. She seemed uber-concerned about making sure I consumed the right amount of everything. "Eat your meat. Drink your milk. No you can't have any candy now." Statements like that flowed from her mouth almost as much as the air she breathed. But somehow it must have paid off because I eat pretty healthy now as a semi-vegetarian (I eat seafood). But I'm also seeing things from my mother's perspective. All it took was Alex's switch to three meals a day, now that he is 12 months old. His pediatrician encourages that he eats a wide variety of food, so I serve him just about everything we eat. And what do I say while he's eating? "Eat your food. Drink your milk. No you can't have dessert now." It was SO easy to rest assured that he was getting his daily nutrients from his bottle. Now, it's up to me (gulp)! I know it gets harder from here as he gets pickier, and more things with less nutitional value become appealing...like when he finds out about McDonald's! So now is the time to show him that there are many healthy choices he will like, and hope that he makes wise choices for himself in the future. It's exactly the same when it comes to spiritual choices. I need to show Alex while he is young that he can have a relationship with God. This will light his path, and make it easier to make choices as he walks through life.
His word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path - Psalms 119:105.

Happy Birthday Alex

2009-02-07T21:12:00.000-08:00

Happy Birthday Sweet Baby Boy! You are our miracle child! You have brought us nothing but joy and delight this past year. Not only have you brought us love...but also hope and faith. Through you, God showed us that hoping for the best and having faith in Him will bring us the desires of our heart! We know God has a special plan for you. He has prepared us for many years to bring you here. We pray that He helps us light the path he has in front of you.
"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be." - Pslam 139: 13-16.

Fast Forward

2009-02-05T19:34:00.000-08:00

Raising a child is almost like living life with your finger constantly pushing down on the fast forward button. The second you look away, your baby has grown beyond belief. Little Alex and his friend Cooper are about 5 weeks apart in age. Both of them delivered early because of pre-eclampsia. Alex just under, and Cooper just over 6 pounds. They were so tiny and helpless as preemies, and now they're tipping the scales at over 20 pounds! Alex has a full head of hair and 2 teeth. Cooper has nearly a full set of front teeth, and a little bit of hair. It was just a year ago that Cooper's mom, Lesley and I were talking about how we were going to raise our babies. Both us of new moms, having no idea what to do. We'd have lunch and talk about how we would feed them, or get them to go to sleep, or set up their nursery. Now we're having lunch talking about them nearly taking their first steps, eating their first foods, going to their first music class, making their first friends, and having their first birthday party. Where did the time go? If you cherished every moment, it went right into your heart and you are grateful for every second. Some people don't live in the moment, even with their children. They think things will be better if only they could get to this....or that.....or have this....or that. God means for us to be happy now....not at a time to be determined later! Joy is ours, if we will only accept it from him! Our babies are always joyful! They live in the moment. To them there is no future....only now. Live in the "now", and know that God is living in it with you! "Don't worry about tomorrow. It will take care of itself. You have enough to worry about today!" - Matthew 6:34

Good Guidance

2009-01-26T19:50:00.000-08:00

(Facebook users, go to my Mommy Blog to see more postings: juliestaley.blogspot.com)

When I worked as a TV news anchor, it felt like every day was a struggle. At first it was enjoyable because I saw it as a challege; a way to get the experience under my belt that I needed to succeed in the industry. There was a real adrenaline rush to do the impossible. To get the story no one else had. But after awhile, I could tell that there was something about working that just wasn't...well...working. I never felt peace with what I was doing...until I had Alex. Even though I am more exhausted than I ever was working in news, I can't wait to get up every day to see what it holds for little Alex. I can't explain why motherhood has come so naturally to me, except perhaps that I have finally found my calling in life. Nothing has ever felt more natural, more peaceful, more joyful than raising this little boy. It is this peace and joy that I am obligated to pass on to him...teaching him how to find the same thing for himself, and hopefully much sooner than I did at 40! Most of that involves listening to the Lord, meditating to hear his voice inside of us. This guidance is the best thing I can give my child; a gift that will last his lifetime.
If we are truly seeking God’s will, we will be led by God’s Spirit. We need to be discerning, but not anxious. Jesus promised, “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you….If you know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him” Luke 11:9-13.

Realizing the Dream

2009-01-20T21:41:00.000-08:00

(If you are reading this on Facebook, check out the Mommy Blog at juliestaley.blogspot.com!)What an amazing and historic day! Not just for America, but for the world...and humanity. The American dream has come true. I did not vote for Barack Obama, but I think he is a fine person. I had the honor of meeting and interviewing him on a couple of stories I did at the State Capitol when he worked in Springfield. I knew then that he was going to go far. His cup runneth over with charisma and integrity. No matter what your political views are, you cannot deny that his rise to the Presidency paves a way for every person in the world to realize that they can do whatever they put their mind to! I am proud that America has turned a page so I can teach my child much easier that the world is not full of people who are exactly like him. Every person is different! Every person has a different look, and a different way of looking at things...and that must be respected. God's plan wasn't to make a cookie cutter world. God's plan was to have diversity all around! How many things are exactly alike in nature? Leaves? Snowflakes? Rocks? Fingerprints? Even idential twins have their differences, even if it's just in their opinion about things. The flu virus is different every season! No two things are ever exactly alike. Celebrate our differences! Honor what someone else has to offer that you can't! God sure is! Remember this:
There are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spirit. There are different kinds of service, but the same Lord. There are different kinds of working, but the same God works all of them in all men. Now to each one the manifestation of the Spirit is given for the common good. To one there is given through the Spirit the message of wisdom, to another the message of knowledge by means of the same Spirit, to another faith by the same Spirit, to another gifts of healing by that one Spirit, to another miraculous powers, to another prophecy, to another distinguishing between spirits, to another speaking in different kinds of tongues, and to still another the interpretation of tongues. All these are the work of one and the same Spirit, and he gives them to each one, just as he determines. - 1 Corinthians 12:4-11.
(Amy Denney Photo)

A New Perspective

2009-01-10T19:23:00.000-08:00

It is almost time to turn around Alex's car seat so he is facing forward instead of facing the back. It's a change I am looking forward to just as much as he is! He'll be a year old in a month (I just can't believe it), and he's already intently studied the layout of the back seat and the view from that part of the car. Now, he's bored and curious and he knows there is more to see! He wiggles and squirms to try to turn around and see out the windshield. He wants to see the world! And he shall, but he has to wait until the right time. That's how God works for us too. He brings us things to block what we want now, so we need to wait on Him for the scenario to play out. It strengthens our faith in Him. But this issue of learning patience for Alex is something Mommy is learning too. I have always struggled with being patient, yet God seems to always have a way to get the lesson through to me! Yeah, sometimes it's painful, or embarassing, or lengthy, but when I pray on it, I can feel the Lord working in it for my good.

"For you have need of steadfast patience and endurance, so that you may perform and fully accomplish the will of God, and thus receive and carry away [and enjoy to the full] what is promised." - Hebrews 10:36.

A Clean Slate

2009-01-04T20:42:00.000-08:00

Alex got his own personal bathtub here when we stayed at the Ritz-Carlton in Chicago last month, thanks to the extra vanity sink we had! He loves taking a bath, and at this point, the smaller the tub, the better. He's too tiny to be in a big bathtub all alone. He might as well be in a swimming pool! Alex slips and slides all over the tub and I'm afraid he's going to hit his head on something since he's very curious at bathtime. So at home he usually is in his infant tub inside the regular bathtub. That means while we're away, a sink like this is perfect! Teaching Alex to stay clean on the inside is just as important as teaching him to stay clean in his heart. Much of that begins with setting a good example. This is where parenting changes you. It forces you to look inside of yourself and see if you are living the purest life possible. Are you living for God's Will, or your own? It is so difficult to surrender to the Lord! I've always had trouble doing that because I felt I knew what was best. But God knows what is best for us today, tomorrow, and always. Sometimes He has to take you down a darker path to bring you to the light. But oh, the things you will learn by going down that path! You'll come out the other side with a renewed and purer spirit. Luckily, every new year allows you to wipe the slate clean, surrender to God, and surround yourself with people to help your children grow in the Spirit!
Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God. - Matthew 5:8.

The Season of Giving

2008-12-28T15:21:00.000-08:00

In this video Alex has learned how to give a toy to Mommy. It is as profound of an act as it is simple. Learning how to give links you to others, and to Christ. Jesus himself was a gift...the gift from God the Father to all of His children. Those who accept will have eternal life. All we have to do is accept! Through Christmas, God reveals the true nature, the source of giving, which is to give something of value with nothing expected in return. No matter who you are (or are not), or what you have (or do not have)...God's gift is for everyone...including you! "The wages of sin is death, but God's gift is eternal life given by Jesus Christ our Lord." - Romans 6:23.

Working Man

2008-12-14T21:14:00.000-08:00

His first job!! Look for this photo of Alex and a "mom" as the newest national print ad for State Farm Insurance. Alex is represented by modeling agencies in Chicago and St. Louis, so we stay busy traveling to casting calls! This particular shoot was in Chicago where they provided Alex with his own hair stylist, makeup artist, and wardrobe coordinator. A lot of people for just one little guy! Even though it's a unique opportunity, I want first and foremost for Alex to enjoy just being a baby, so I have prayed that this is the right decision, and that it will be something to help us witness to others!
"I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you." - Psalm 32:81.

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year!

2008-12-08T14:10:00.000-08:00

Ahhh....the holidays are here! I'm one of those people who likes to get my Christmas shopping done early. I hate the crowds and because it's so busy, I'm always in a hurry. This year however, it's been a much different story. I have been too busy as a new mom to shop ahead of time. So when I hit the mad rush at the stores I didn't feel impatient or frustrated by it, I welcomed it! I was so happy to share this with my son and create new Christmas memories for me and for him (Daddy too)! But I look forward to the days when he'll know the joy of the season comes because of the birth of Christ. That is the best gift you can receive!

"Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above" - James 1:17.

Turkey Talk

2008-11-29T20:11:00.000-08:00

Even little Alex got stuffed full of Thanksgiving goodies from our family feast. He's in that stage now where he likes to try new foods (especially if he can feed himself), so the holiday table was a true cornucopia! Yams, stuffing, turkey, and mashed potatoes topped his list of acceptable items. He also liked the pumpkin turtle pie that his 14 year old cousin Lauren made (so did I)! Of course he ate the most of his favorite snack: Cheerios. Hey, whole grain, low sugar. Can't be too bad! But the most important part of the meal wasn't anything we ate, it was what we consumed in our hearts, through gratitude. The prayer his uncle, Father Joe, gave before our meal was to fill our hearts, and remind us why we gather for this day. It's ironic that we take one whole day out of the year to show us what we should be doing every day of the year: simply giving thanks. It's a cornerstone of your relationship with Christ. Without it, you have nothing. Dozens of bible verses talk about the importance of a grateful heart. It was that gratitiude that opened the door for me to accept the blessing God had to offer me of a child. My infertility was a journey of gratitude, of finally accepting that God's plan will bring you blessing after blessing.

"Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good; His love endures forever." - I Chronicles 16:3

This verse is important for the phrase "He is good." Knowing and promising that God is good, means he will bring good things to you when you believe in Him! Trust in His way always!

"I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." - Jeremiah 29:11.

Carry this verse in your heart every day, and your gratitude will grow!

Powerful Words

2008-11-20T21:02:00.000-08:00

I have taken what feels like a billion snapshots and umpteen video clips of Alex since he was born. Each one is more precious than the next, but what an amazing feeling as a parent when you capture a "first" for your child's development! For us, it was the day this video was taken (no, he is not usually allowed to play with the window cords he has in his hand), and Alex repeated "Da Da" back to me. I was so stunned that he said this that I was speechless in the video. Now he knows exactly who "Da Da" is (apparently we're still working on "Ma Ma"!) and repeats it every time we ask him, or he sees "Da Da". He also knows what "bye bye" means. He can't say the word yet, but when he pats his hand down, that is his way of communicating the word "bye bye"; Alex's very own "sign language", so to speak. What makes this significant, is not that Alex said the word "Da Da", or gestures the word "bye bye", because he has said or signed them dozens of times already. But at this point, he actually knows what they mean; he knows the importance of words. Here begins some of lessons that point to what life is all about: communicating what is in our heart. Because God and Christ are one, Jesus was known as the "Word of God". "The Son is the radiance of God's glory and the exact representation of His being, sustaining all things by His powerful Word." - Hebrews 1:3. Remember that. Words have power. God's words have power. Our words spoken to God have power, and as a Christian, our words spoken to anyone has power because God is behind them, as He is in our heart.

Lessons Learned

2008-11-13T19:52:00.000-08:00

Proverbs 24:32 asks, "Will you not learn a lesson and obey my words?" Becoming a mom means you're always learning a new lesson from God, from your child, and even other parents. Still, here are a few things I have learned on my own!

When feeding himself, your baby's long sleeves sleeves will also double as a napkin.

When feeding himself, your baby's socks will also double as a napkin, when he pulls them off and puts them in his mouth.

If you have dogs, they will begin to realize rather quickly that a baby is a food source, conveniently planting themselves under the high chair to watch for falling debris.

Any electrical outlet you don't find, or forget to put safety plugs into, your baby can find in a matter of seconds, but only when you're not looking.

When you're out of the room for just one second, a crawling baby can make his way across a room before you get back.

Your baby will show you that shoes and socks are a great substitute for a pacifier.

Anything you need in your diaper bag will be conveniently located at the very bottom of the bag when you need it quickly while you are driving a car.

Simple tips I could have used until now! But lessons learned are always time well spent.

Life's a Playground

2008-11-04T23:32:00.000-08:00

I've always been a bit of a neat freak, so I have expected that things will always remain in their carefully designated place in the house. Now, many of those things aren't even anywhere to be seen. Anything fragile is now Fisher Price. Weebles take the place of Waterford. Lalique is now Little Tikes. My whole house is a playground. I have toys in every room...including bathrooms and a closet! However, this didn't happen overnight. It was a gradual change...a baby swing here...a bassinet there...then a walker...and some stuffed animals...and Fisher Price people...and a playhouse...and baby puzzles...and on and on. I sit back and wonder how things have changed so much, so fast. But change is part of life. In fact it IS life...nothing stays the same. We grow older every second. Hopefully we grow wiser as well. In time, before I know it, these toys will be gone, and my living room will be the quiet respite I have known with a place for everything, and everything in it's place. And I'll wonder...how did Alex grow up so fast? Then I'll long for him to be next to me playing in a mound of toys as he does today. Live in the moment because it never comes again!

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace. - Ecclesiasties 3. 1-8

Halloween Healing

2008-11-02T18:03:00.000-08:00

Sage advice says "trust your first instinct." I suppose I should have stuck with my first instinct for a career choice. When I was a little girl I longed to be a nurse...to care for others at a great time of need. I was always a horrible math student, so when I reached a point in school where I realized I'd need alot of math to make my way in nursing, I figured that was my sign to go another direction and it was just a childhood whim that I was interested in that career...until now. We had planned for a full day and evening for Alex to go trick or treating this Halloween, posing as Darth Vader (I'm a Star Wars NUT). Instead I kept him home for most of it because he had a cold. It was his first time being sick, so I took all the precautions I could, as directed by his pediatrician's office. Poor thing can't blow his nose, so I was swabbing it, wiping it, putting saline into it, whatever I could so he didn't actually SOUND like Darth Vader when he breathed. He had a little medicine I'd give him, but since his nose was all stopped up, he could hardly drink his bottle because he'd have to stop and breathe. I'd give him cereal in a spoon if he was hungry enough, but he wasn't very hungry. Granted, it was just a cold, but it still took meticulous caretaking, and I found that kind of nurturing resonating in my soul because I somehow felt it was giving my baby some peace so he felt comforted. Sure it's every mother's duty to care for her sick children, but this was the kind of feeling I instantly recognized...from about 35 years ago, when I wanted to be a nurse. That was also the time I began recognizing my dedication to Christ. Not coincidentally, there is a strong belief that caring for the sick is it's own ministry. It is no guarantee for a cure, but it is what Christ asks us to do. "Heal the sick who are there and tell them, 'The kingdom of God is near you.' " - Luke 10:9. So when it gets tough during those restless nights when your sick child can't sleep, remember you're not just helping their body, you are also helping their soul. God will remember.

The Culture Club

2008-10-27T22:08:00.000-07:00

Imagine the laughter as three mommies show up for a play date and their baby boys are all wearing the same color...light blue! Not hard when you consider it's practically the only color you can buy baby boys' clothes in (what's up with that?). But it is an interesting conicidence when you consider the vastly different cultures they come from. Little Alex's friend, 7 month old Luke (on the left), is Japanese-American. He lives in Sano, Japan with his Japanese father and American mother (you can see their blog at http://minezakis.blogspot.com). Luke's cousin, 4 month old Elias (on the right), lives here in our area with his parents and four siblings (you can see their blog at http://thehomeierclan.blogspot.com). He has two brothers and two sisters, and only two of them are Caucasian. Probably the only link the three share, besides being sweet little boys (and wearing blue all the time), is that they are all growing in the Spirit of Christ. They are learning to love the Lord each step of the way, as in the lyrics to the familiar Sunday school song:

Jesus loves the little children,
All the children of the world.
Red and yellow, black and white,
All are precious in His sight.
Jesus loves the little children of the world

What an amazing lesson to learn so early in life! Being different is God's natural plan. Throughout His exceptionally created world, there is so much diversity in it's nature. Even down to snowflakes. No two are ever alike. The lesson of diversity then isn't hard to teach when it is a fundamental part of every day life. It's just seen as the way things are meant to be, just the way God made us...in His image.

"Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it." - Proverbs 22:6

A Change of Season

2008-10-26T18:41:00.001-07:00

Change is here! As we were warned, our whole world has been turned upside down now that Alex is crawling. Not only do you have to actually get down on his level and look for things to keep him away from (like electrical outlets or cords from curtains and blinds), but since babies crawl at lightning fast speed, you also have to be ready at a second's notice to literally sprint across a room and grab him if he goes after something you have missed...like a toy the dog drug in after slobbering all over it while outside. Or perhaps electrical cords that you just didn't see at the time. Of course playpens are a great invention to keep your child corralled, but when they feel like exploring (which is often), then you have no choice but to let them cruise around on all fours. Exploration is what life is made of. Finding what makes you YOU is your mission. The Lord will light the way, no matter what season you are in. "He guides the humble in what is right and teaches them his way." - Psalm 25:9

A Valuable Visitor

2008-10-15T20:36:00.000-07:00

Alex's cousin Charlie came to visit us recently. Charlie is 3. He is the youngest of my sister's four children, so I thought he'd enjoy being the "big kid" for a few days as he visited here. I also thought it would give me an idea of what it's like to really take care of two kids instead of one. I mean, once you've got it down caring for a baby, how hard can it be to have a child who is potty trained and can talk and feed himself? Well, the key isn't getting a child who can do more things for himself (although that helps), rather it's having a parent (or caregiver) who is can put their children first. Children thrive on personal contact and attention. This is how they develop social skills and create pathways for learning. For me then, it was constant work, since I just learned how to care for one child. But I loved it! It took every second I had...one child needing something at every moment. Naps...a diaper for one...a trip to the potty for the other...a bottle for one...a snack for the other...a hug and kiss for one...and hug and kiss for the other. I was busy every minute, and it was sometimes hectic, but I was in my element. I was submerged in what I love most...mothering...and that felt peaceful. That peace comes so easily when you are naturally doing what God wants from you. Find what that is in your life, and feel the peace! "Seek God's will in all you do, and He will direct your path." - Proverbs 3:6

Sharing the Miracle

2008-10-11T13:09:00.000-07:00

Miracles do happen! We are sharing our journey through infertility on http://www.springfieldmoms.org/

It's part of the e-newsletter put out twice a week. You can also view it later on their archive.

We hope our struggle can bring hope to many.

Keep Matthew 18:19 close to your heart, "Again I say unto you, That if two of you shall agree on earth as touching any thing that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven."

Opening the Door

2008-10-07T19:32:00.000-07:00

Alex can't get anything unless has a way to tell me. Of course that's what God made cries for! He can cry if he's hungry, tired, needs to be changed, or even just held. But he's also growing into a little boy that can give me even more specific cues, such as squeals when he's hungry, or downright screams if he's tired. He has a fussy grunting sound if he needs to be changed. He even has a whine if he is bored or feels left out, for instance if I'm on the phone, or even have to leave the room for a minute. Funny enough, he even has a signal to tell me he wants to be alone for a second. I see him thinking and contemplating something, like how a new toy works. It's really cute. When he can communicate with me, I can give him what he needs. The exact same thing translates directly into our relationship with God. When you ask him for something, He will grant it to you. I know that sounds somewhat cliche, but God the desires of your heart are put there by God.
"Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart." - Psalm 37:4
That is your roadmap for the assignment you have here. God puts in your heart what He needs you to do! It's so simple! So, imagine how frustrated I was for years as I knew my assignment was to be a mother. The desire of my heart was to have a child, and I kept asking God to grant that desire, yet He never did. I even asked Him to remove the desire from my heart, and kept looking for things outside of myself to pin that energy on. But it always failed. I always kept coming back to the realization that I was supposed to be a mother. I knew finally that I was right on target when I realized that my infertility was about my relationship with God, and letting go to let Him take control. Once I processed that, I knew I would get pregnant. And four months later I did! Nothing in my life has ever felt so natural and fulfilling as being a mother. It is the piece I have been looking for to complete the peace in my life. Open the door to the desires of your heart by simply asking!
"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you." - Matthew 7:7

Soul Food

2008-10-07T18:59:00.000-07:00

"Like newborn babies, crave pure spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation." - 1 Peter 2:2
One thing I love...is food. Gourmet food. So if you love something, you never can go wrong by learning how to make it yourself. Through our cooks, and family recipies, I have learned through the years to do a bit of gourmet cooking. So, it was easy for me to whip up some food for Alex when my pediatrician said he didn't have to eat store-bought baby food. I just made a few things naturally, organically, to give him the purest food possible. Imagine my surprise then, when I checked out some information my mommy friend Lesley gave me about making your own baby food, and found I was using many of the same methods and recipies similar to what they had! Yet, even with the effort I make to give Alex the purest of food, what he will need the most in his life is to be pure in Spirit. So we start now with his path of enlightenment, to help him stay on course, body and soul.

An Easy Life

2008-10-06T18:47:00.000-07:00

Well, things are getting easier. Alex can feed himself a bottle, he has a regular nap schedule, mostly sleeps all night, likes trying new food, and loves to ride in the car. Of course that all means he's getting big fast! It sure makes it easier to get out with him. He has become very social, and loves to be around people and activity, so I find the more he gets out, the happier he is. We started a music class today at Musikgarten (www.musikgarten.org), a fabulous school that teaches the appreciation of music to children from birth to nine years. Alex loves the playtime and the bonding time with Mommy, and getting to see his friends like Cooper (whose Mom, Lesley, told us about the school...thanks)!

The idea behind teaching music so young, is that music is a pathway to greater learning and comprehension. I believe that brings the most precious thing a person can have after they have been Saved by Christ: wisdom. "For wisdom is more precious than rubies, and nothing you desire can compare with her." - Proverbs 8:11 Even a good education can't make up for lack of wisdom. It comes through life's experiences...experiences that begin early, like making music or having friends when you're just a baby.

Seeing is Believing

2008-09-30T11:02:00.000-07:00

I saw Alex as he awoke yesterday morning. He did his usual routine of grabbing his pacifier and putting it in his mouth (like a morning cup of coffee, I guess;0). Then he started his happy babble, so I knew he was ready to get up. I put my hands out and he reached out with both arms and he pulled himself up to sit. Then with his paficier in his mouth he flashed the biggest smile! I saw he was intently looking at something, so I turned to see what it was. It was one of the dogs. She was lying in the corner of the room (a place she never goes) because it was storming outside. Alex could see her about 15 feet away from his crib, but Mommy....could not (I desperately need glasses but am too stubborn to get it done)! It was such a joy for me not to just see Alex smile, but to see that something brought him joy as well. He is starting to really get interested in the dogs, but since he just wants to pull their hair right now, it's best we just keep him occupied with something else! "Teach me what I cannot see." - Job 34:32

I've Got Something To Say

2008-09-28T21:25:00.000-07:00

Alex is in that stage now where he is starting to know that he wants things, but can't tell me in words (He's tried using Grandpa Bob's microphones, but without words it doesn't do a lot of good). So Alex has developed a way he bounces when I mention something he likes. It's so cute. He's actually been doing this for quite a while with a bottle. He's recognized that for a long time. But now it's simple things like getting picked up, playing with a certain toy, or even changing his diaper are all something he gets excited about, if that is what he wants at the moment. Luckily as a mother, I'm able to respond to those things usually before he even knows he wants them. I know when he'll want to eat, sleep, play, or change his diaper. I am reassured that God works in our lives the same way. Sometimes, however, he holds back things we think we want, only to bless us with something much greater later on! We just have to remain faithful! Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him. -Matthew 6:8

Tummy Time

2008-09-20T20:42:00.001-07:00

He's just about to start crawling, so after months of trying to get Alex to enjoy playing on his tummy, he now wants to be on his tummy alot! Child experts say you're supposed to give your baby "tummy time" each day so they can develop the muscles needed to start crawling. But when your child doesn't like being on their tummy, a sensitive mommy will give in! It seemed like one day he just rolled over onto his tummy and decided he liked it. We got video the other night of Alex on his tummy (because we thought he was about to crawl any second). He scooted around a bit on his tummy, and spun himself from right to left, but never really propelled forward in any measurable way. I'm sure that's going to happen any second, so I'll keep the video camera handy. ;) What scary is that he's already standing by himself when he's holding onto something, so once he starts crawling, it won't be long for him to make the connection that if you can both crawl and stand, then you can certainly walk! Of course the most important first steps Alex will take are the Spiritual ones. He relys on Mommy and Daddy to help light that path. "Blessed are all who fear the LORD, who walk in his ways." - Psalm 128:1-3

Growing Pains

2008-09-16T18:33:00.000-07:00

I'm not sure if growing pains are harder on the child, or the parent. We're teething now (and drooling!), and even though Alex is not a very fussy baby, it just hurts me to no end to see him uncomfortable. He does pretty good if I keep him occupied. As long as he stays busy, he doesn't seem to focus on the discomfort. I find that works for me too. I learned to master that skill in yoga: keep your mind on what's positive, and the negative loses it's energy. It's easier to say than to do though. When I went through infertility, it seemed like nothing was positive to me. Come to think of it, labor pain was about the same experience until I got the epidural! :) Still, many pains in life are there to grow from. So, in whatever you do, stay positive. "Practice these things. Devote your life to them." 1 TIMOTHY 4:15

Breath of Life

2008-09-14T21:18:00.000-07:00

One of the most simple acts has now become my favorite passion...just watching my baby breathe. I waited so long to have this child as I fought infertility, that each breath of his is precious to me. Mark's father has been fighting for the breath that we take for granted. Two weeks ago we hurriedly went to my husband's parents' house to help with his father, who has been on hospice care, suffering from Pulmonary Fibrosis. Henry had taken a turn for the worse, so Mark and I took shifts along with Mark's brother to care for Henry in a 24 hour vigil. He was taking morphine, so his body was falling into a drug-induced coma, and he needed constant care and monitoring. When his breathing became more forced and shallow, we had to administer more meds. Mark and his brother would usually just sit or sleep in the room with their father on their shift, but since I had Alex to watch, and the baby monitor wouldn't reach to all parts of the house, I had to keep going in and out of the room...Henry's room, and Alex's room. I would make my rounds my checking on Alex when he was asleep, just watching him breathe....literally seeing life in its infancy, and thinkng of all of the possibilities that lie ahead for him. I would feel his forehead and hands, and make sure he wasn't too hot or too cold. Then I would walk down the hall to Henry's room, and watch him breathe...literally seeing the sunset of a life, and thinking of the amazing experiences that came along for him. I would feel Henry's forehead and hands, to make sure he wasn't too hot or too cold. On Sunday, September 7th, Alex and his daddy were sitting next to Henry watching football (Henry's grandfather was the founder of the Chicago Bears, so football was a true pastime and legacy for the men of the family). During the game, Henry took his last breath. It was the cycle of life...in a way, starting as we end...in the hand of those we love. Every stage of life is a gift, to be shared with others.

"The Spirit of God has made me; the breath of the Almighty gives me life." Job 33:3-5

A Perfect Child

2008-09-01T20:15:00.000-07:00

Matthew 19:14Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these." Heeding the words of Matthew, Alex went to church last weekend. He had been there before, but Daddy was gone for the evening, so I was on my own. I came into the service a couple of minutes late because of road construction (grrr), toting my precious cargo (luckily they were singing praise hymns, so we weren't too noticeable!)...finding a seat near the back. Alex was on unusual behavior. He was quiet, but kept turning around and smiling at the couple sitting behind us. And he kept turning around, and kept at it, and kept at it. It was cute from my perspective, but it didn't give that couple much peace as they had to keep smiling and nodding at Alex! For the few seconds he wasn't grabbing things or squirming around, I looked around a congregation I've seen for years. For the first time, instead of seeing adults....people....men and women, I saw mothers....children....families. Funny how many things you can see when you open your eyes on the other side of infertility. I saw across the sanctuary a woman frantically rocking a baby about the age of Alex. She had that look I know well that if you rock faster somehow your baby will go to sleep faster. It doesn't always work. :) I saw a man holding a child with special needs, trying to keep him occupied during the long service. I saw a couple keeping their toddler busy while he played next to them. Then as he threw a small toy over the congregation and into the back of the church, his mother covered her face with her hand and sunk. I gave them a smile that said "I know those days are ahead of me!" I saw about a half dozen other parents dashing in and out of the service with children of various ages. Then there were the "tweeners", the children old enough to go to the bathroom on their own, and getting up several times during the service. What's common here? Children are PERFECT. They are perfectly created by God to bring blessing to our lives. Psalm 127:3 assures us that "Sons are a heritage from the LORD, children a reward from him." But what about children who might put a burden on families? People who perhaps cannot afford to have another child? Unmarried mothers? Children with disabilities? Oh you of little faith! (Matthew 6:30) God works through our children to bring us what we need in our lives. To toughen us, to soften us, to enlighten us. Certainly children don't come to us to make life easier, but to make life better. Stand firm with faith and know that God always brings you what you need, and never brings you more than you can handle. It didn't seem to be a problem for Alaska Governor and 2008 Vice-Presidential candidate Sarah Palin who just gave birth to a baby with Down's Syndrome. How does she feel about him? She says "he's absoloutely perfect." And so does God. Every child is learning. Every child is finding their own way of doing things. Every child makes mistakes. Every child is a gift from God. That makes every child perfect.

Prayer Does Work!

2008-08-30T13:00:00.000-07:00

Praise Him! In my last entry I said I was going to pray for little Alex to sleep without his swing: 1 Samuel 1:27 "I prayed for this child, and the LORD has granted me what I asked of him." That night, Alex slept all night in a bassinet! It is not the crib, but it is also not the swing or Mommy and Daddy's bed. This is a huge step in the right direction! I can still tell that Alex has some kind of need to feel nestled at night. He likes to snuggle, either with Mommy or Daddy, or with his head cradled in his swing or car seat. I put little bumpers in the bassinet and he goes right to sleep. Of course I watch him and take the bumpers out once he's deep asleep.
Praise God for His quick response to our prayers! Now Alex, along with Mommy and Daddy can get some sleep, while God keeps us in His hands. "My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip; he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep" Psalm 121:1-4

Peaceful ZZZ's

2008-08-28T18:53:00.000-07:00

One thing I knew I wanted to splurge on when I planned Alex's nursery was the crib. I spent an inordinate amount of time looking for just the right one that would be safe, comfortable, and beautiful. Once I got the crib all set up and the nursery decorated I knew it was the right one, and was anxious to watch my baby boy sleep soundlessly in it. And now, at almost 7 months old, I'm still waiting for him to do so! He hates sleeping in anything but his aquarium swing or Mommy and Daddy's bed. He doesn't even start crying when is in the crib, he starts crying when I bend over to put him down in the crib....before he even hits the mattress! What's a new mother to do? Well, his pediatrician said I need to let him "cry it out." Of course that's the last solution on my list. And wouldn't you know, my husband suggested this method long ago, so I'm going against the majority now! I've tried working up to the crib, but starting out having Alex fall asleep in the swing, then moving him to the crib. I've tried to let him cry while I kneel next to him and shush and pat (feverishly). But it hasn't gotten either of us very far, except more time sleeping in the swing! So I'm turning to Samuel: 1 Samuel 1:27 "I prayed for this child, and the LORD has granted me what I asked of him." I'm hoping I'll have a sense of peace when I try to enforce a new sleep routine on my baby, and on me. I'll keep you posted!

Empty Nest Syndrome

2008-08-22T13:25:00.000-07:00

You might think being the mother of a six month old boy that it's a little early for me to be thinking about the "empty nest syndrome." But it sure crossed my mind this week. We have two dogs, and one of them, a 90 pound black lab, dug up a nest of newborn rabbits a couple of weeks ago. She didn't kill them, just dug up the hole and they all ended up in hiding in the grass....so scared. Of course I was horrified that our gentle mannered pooch did this, so my husband and I gently gathered up the bunnies and put them back in their little hole and covered them up with grass. They were so tiny and so new! They hardly even had hair covering their bodies. I felt an instant sense of responsibility for them now, as if God had put them in our backyard to watch over. But what do I know about taking care of baby bunnies? I'm doing good to take care of a baby boy! Remember that "A righteous man cares for the needs of his animal, but the kindest acts of the wicked are cruel." -Proverbs 12:10
So I called my vet and asked what we do. They said if we got them back in the nest, it's the best thing we can do, and nature can take it from there. The momma would be along once a day to feed them, and we'd never see her. Well, I knew that the lawnmowing service would be here in a couple of days, and that could be then end of the bunnies. So I quickly put markers out in the lawn so they would mow around the nest. I checked on the bunnies several times a day to make sure they were still thriving and had not been scared out of their hole (mostly by our dogs). I'd put a lawn chair over the nest to shade it during the day (moving it periodically with the sunlight), and when it poured rain I made sure the chair was sheltering them from that as they huddled down in that hole with no covering since the rain washed away their grass roof. Sure, it's way more care than they would have if they had been anywhere else, but they were in my backyard....so my responsibility! I even took Alex out to the bunny hole each day to show him what Mommy was doing. He certainly doesn't understand, but he knew it was important because he watched with wide-eyed wonder! I saw how fast they were growing, almost too big for the hole! I felt a sense of peace about their well-being, like I had nurtured them to maturity (even though it was the momma bunny that I never saw). When the lawn service came again, I saw that they had ignored the markers and mowed over the hole! I ran out there to check on the bunnies...bracing myself to see proof that the babies had met their doom by the lawnmower. But I didn't see that. Instead, I saw an empty hole. An empty rabbit nest, and I realized that peace I felt meant they were ready to go out on their own. I felt lonely for them for a brief moment, that I had cared for these wild animals as they moved into my life (or just my backyard) for a couple of weeks. They were so helpless and needed a boost since their mom put them in a really bad location. Now, they had grow big enough to hop out on their own, and hopefully find rabbit holes that aren't on enemy territory (i.e. a dog's backyard). So if I felt this moved by tiny wild rabbits I cared for in two weeks, how will I feel when my baby boy leaves home in 18 years?

Going Green

2008-08-21T15:16:00.000-07:00

Diapers, wipes, food containers, product packaging, grocery bags.... It didn't bother me as much how wasteful we all are when I didn't have a child. But now it seems like the waste has multiplied, hence, so has my conscience about it. I always thought it was so trite to hear people talk about leaving a cleaner planet for their children, but it makes perfect sense once you're a parent. You want the best for your child, and throwing away something today becomes their problem tomorrow. I was thrilled yesterday when we got take out pizza from Monical's and they didn't put it in a wasteful pizza box! It was all wrapped up in paper and foil (they could have ditched the foil) in a nice pizza "bag". Refreshing (and darn good pizza)! I'm also tired of paying $75 to fill up a car with gas. I've even looked into alternatives, but not many choices are coming down the assembly line anytime soon. Many of the hybrids or alternative fuel cars aren't coming out until 2009, and those that are on the market now have such an immensely long waiting list along with an exorbitant mark up fee. Some of them even used diesel! Nice option....my gas will cost MORE. So what to do until then? Wait. And pray.
The Bible even points out what could come if we are not mothering our planet:
"And the nations were angry, and thy wrath is come, and the time of the dead, that they should be judged, and that thou shouldest give reward unto thy servants the prophets, and to the saints, and them that fear thy name, small and great; and shouldest destroy them which destroy the earth." -Revelations 11:18
It is also shown in the Bible that we are mere guests here, given life by the grace of God. He wants us to live fully, but be responsible!
Genesis 1:28 says "And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth."
I think if you find one way each day, or each week to make a difference that's all that matters. For example it's said Americans throw away about 10,000 sheets of paper per person each year! Can't you just stop printing so much stuff of the internet? Do you really need to print something on a new clean sheet of paper? Can't you use the back side of something you are throwing away? Or try asking for paperless tickets or bills on the internet? What about water bottles? How many do you throw away? Try drinking out of a cup instead. And those darn plastic bags from grocery stores? Just start with small things and work your way from there. Today I had only a few items when I checked out, and I just grabbed them all and walked to my car. No bag. No waste. No problem. Just start by making an effort. Every little bit helps!

I'm Pinching Myself

2008-08-20T15:17:00.000-07:00

"You don't have to put an age limit on your dreams." That's what Dara Torres said after winning a silver medal at the Olympics in Beijing. She is 41 years old. I certainly thought there was an age limit on my dream as I sunk into the abyss of infertility. But after seven invitro fertilizations over 5 years, it finally happened. The key? I'd like to say it was some breakthrough in fertility treatments, but the truth is, it was my relationship with God that made all the difference. I had heard SO MANY TIMES, stories about couples who "gave up" and then it finally happened for them. I certainly wasn't going to give up....that was preposterous! How can you give up and get something? Well, that is the magic of great Faith. The "Zen" of God. It's about letting go and letting God. When I finally gave up, I realized that my infertility wasn't about me being infertile in my womb, it was about me being infertile in my Faith. Infertile to do His work and spread The Word. With this epiphany, a voice told me I would get pregnant, and four months later I did! Now we have little Alex (Alexander Eugene) who is 6 months old, and worth every second we waited! My little blog here is about my thoughts as I maneuver down the Mommy track, after a 23 year career as a television news anchor. You'll read about my triumphs, my errors (I'll try to keep those to a minimum), and my Faith. Remember that "all things are possible for those who love the Lord." -Matthew 19:26. What is your dream? Let go, and let God make it happen!